Thursday, May 4, 2000
Enfirno vs. Kyle Kash
*Special Guest Referees:Lance McNally and Mac D.
Tag Team Title Match
Winds of Change vs. Eastsiderz
Hardcore Title Match
Shawn Arrows vs. Guff Daddy
T.Q. Smooth vs. Nucking Futs
Azrael vs. Kris Kanton
Azrael Damodred vs. Donnie Daze
("Rock Superstar" by Cypress Hill plays in the background as the IML2 logo fades in. We fade into the backstage area of Tom Ford's office. Jay Taylor and Eric Yun are there.)
President Ford:Okay guys, we can't have ANY more bickering. I want peace to be made now. This isn't getting anywhere, and you know what, we're drawing down the ratings, so, I want you two to shake and call things off, and call peace.
VP Eric Yun:That lowly chairmen had Psycho Jay HUMP my head on national television! He humiliated you!
President Ford:You know how many heads he has humped on national television? You aren't the first Eric.
Chairman Jay:Yeah! Don't worry about it. Everything is under control...
President Ford:It better be, and you know what, I'm giving you BOTH the night off!
Chairman Jay & VP Eric:WHAT!
President Ford:With pay of course... See you this sunday...
(Ford walks out of his office and Eric and Jay stare each other down.)
Eric & Jay:THIS IS YOUR FAULT... WAIT! NO!... IT'S... FORGET IT!
(Eric and Jay both leave offices in different directions. The camera fades back into the arena, as fans are going nuts. Baines, Duce, and Lorin are sitting in their announcer positions.)
TB:MONDAY NIGHT MELEE!
DJ:YEAH! Melee is gonna rock!
DJ:It's called sarcasm! I've never seen a bunch of lowly wrestlers fighting on an IML2 card. I mean, Enfirno is headlining the card! That's pathetic!
TB:Let's get to the ring...
DJ: Well, the next matchup here on Melee is against two newcomers who have made an impact so far in their short IML² Careers, Azrael and Kris Kanton. There have been some heated words between these two in the past few days, and this should be a damn good matchup.
TB: Ya damn right it is gonna be a Damn Good Match, Azrael is the Number One Contender to the Hardcore Title, and has a damn good shot at the Pay Per View to become the Number One Contender to the Platinum Title at the PPV, but he has two damn good opponents and a helluva Gimmick Match to go through !!!
Lorin: I dont want to see any of this damn Blood that I know we are about to see !!!
TB: Ya Chicken, ya dont like blood, you suck. Wait a minute folks, I am getting word from the back that this match has just ben placed under .... NO HOLDS BARRED RULES !!!! Why in the world would they want to have No Holds Barred rules with these two !?
Lorin: NO!!!! Were gonna see blood, its unavoidable !!!
(All of a sudden, the lights begin to dim. The Faint sound of Sirens are heard, and they continue to get louder and louder, until they seem to be right in the arena. They slowly begin to fade away as "Back in Black" by ACDC hits the Speakers. The fans havent heard this theme from any of the IML² Superstars, but it is Azrael and his beutiful
Girlfriend Cara by his side walking down to the ring. Azrael has a microphone in his hand and is talking as he is walking to the ring as the announcer is doing his job.)
Azrael: Alright, I am gonna make this short and sweet, this whole "Azrael Name" Controversy that I have been hearing in the back and about me stealing that name and all this other bullshit, so I decided that I am just gonna say the hell with this whole name. From now on, you people can call me by my real name, Josh Black. Now bring
this Kanton sumbitch out here so I can smoke his ass, then go to the back and drink my beers !!!!
("The Real Slim Shady" by Eminem hits the Speakers as Kris Kanton is making his way to the ring with a 2x4 wrapped in Barbed Wire and throws it into the ring as the now proclaimed Josh Black is just staring down Kanton. Kanton also has a microphone as he is walking to the ring, and he begins to speak.)
Kanton: Well, I cant really blame ya for changing your name, but that shows me that you are somewhat scared that you were gonna lose your match at the Pay Per View, which of course you were going to do anyway, and you didnt want Damodred to make up some lame ass name for you that you would have to go around with for a month. So I'm just gonna kick your ass son .....
Black: Bring it on son, bring it on ...
(Kanton steps into the ring, but as he is, "The Beutiful People" by Marilon Manson hits the speakers and Azrael Damodred running to the ring. Kanton and Black both see it, and they are ready as Damodred jumps over the top rope. They grab him in a Double Chokeslam Position and drop him down in a High Time type maneuver as the
Bell rings. Black and Kanton unload on each other with Right Hands. Black whips Kanton into the ropes and connects with a Flying Forearm smash. It fazes Kanton somewhat, but not enough to slow him down. Black whips himself into the ropes, trys for a Flying Clothesline, but Kanton ducks. Black catches himself and runs into the
other side ropes, but as he is coming back, Kanton nails him with a Lou Thez Press followed by Ten Hard Right Hands. Kanton throws Black into the ropes and applys a quick sleeper, hoping to stop any momentum Black had. As Black starts to fade, Kanton drops him in a Neckbreaker Type Move. The Pin ...
Lorin: Kanton almost ended this right there guys. But Black is back up now, Kanton with a Whip into the ropes, Kris leapfrogs him, Black back into the other side ropes, Black shoulder blocks him from halfway across the ring. Black grabs the 2X4 laced in Barbed Wire that Kanton brought to the ring. Now what the hell is he gonna do with
TB/DJ at Same time: HIT HIM WITH IT !!!!!!
Lorin: Oh god, here comes blood ....
(Black whips Kanton into the ropes with his left hand, and as Kanton is coming back, Black swings. Kanton ducks in the knick of time. But Black turns around and nails Kris right between the eyes with the 2X4. Some blood begins to trickle down out of a small gash created by the barbed wire right down the middle of Kantons face. Black tosses the 2X4 to the rampway and Kanton soon follows. Black sets Kris up for a Piledriver on the 2X4, but Kanton reverses with a backdrop, and Black barely misses landing on the barbed wire. Kanton in control now, he is dragging Black to the top of the ramp. He whips the dazed Black into part of the set, which almost knocks the whole thing down. Kanton picks Black back up and sets him up for a Gorilla Press Slam, and whether he meant to or not, he threw Black right into the IWO-Trons bottom pipe set. Blacks knee is wrapped up in some of that pipe, its gonna break if he doesnt get it out soon. Kanton runs back down the ramp and grabs the 2X4, and hits a Running Shot on Black, busting him open from ear to ear. The impact was enough to loosen Black knee being restrained on the IWO-Tron, and he falls backward off the 15 Foot High Bottom piping to the top of the ramp. A small crack is heard, most likely broken ribs as Black trys to defend himself. Kanton continues to beat down his opponent with that 2X4 and Barbed Wire, and in a strategic move, nails Blacks ribs and back with the 2X4. Black falls to the ground in pain, and in one last shot, Kanton nails Blacks left knee, which has been known to be the weakest part on his body after numerous injuries. Kanton locks up Blacks legs and turns him over for a Sharpshooter. The referee is down to check Black, but he isnt giving up. Kanton gets a little ticked at this, and hooks it up even more, placing an extreme amount of pressure on Blacks Knees and Back/Ribcage area. Black still wont give up. Kanton finally lets go of the hold and goes back to work on the back and ribs of Black. He breaks off a piece of the Steel Piping used for the set and is going to nail Black with it, but the man formerly known as Azrael hits a hard low blow, and Black goes for the pin ....
TB: This has been a great matchup so far !!! These two have beat the living hell out of each other. But I believe that right now, Kanton has the better chance of winning, as he has a Strategy to beat down Blacks Ribs, Back, and Knee enough so that if he does go for that Jack-Knife Powerbomb Finisher, the "Fear Effect".
Lorin: I just want this to end so I dont have to see all this blood !!!
DJ: Lorin, I believe that I speak for Tom here as well, SHUT UP.
TB: Yeap, thats what I was gonna say ....
Lorin: You two are pathetic ...
(Black now has somewhat of an advantage over Kanton. He whips him into the set once again, and with every blow that thing is taking, it could tip at any moment. Black grabs another piece of the set and knocks Kanton about out cold with it. He whacks Kanton in the back about ten times with that piece of piping, and proceeds to lock on a Steiner Recliner. Kanton is almost out cold from that one shot with the hard piping, but the pain of the Steiner Recliner wakes him up something good. The referee checks him, he's still in it. A few moments pass, and as each second ticks off, Black seems to pull back more and more and more on that hold. Kanton still wont give up. Black releases the hold and looks around to see if there is anything useful there to hit Kanton with. He gets an idea, and proceeds to throw Kanton over his shoulder and power him down to the Rampway. He climbs up to the bottom of the IWO-Tron and goes for a Senton Bomb, but Kanton rolls out of the way just in time, and Black hits the ramp hard. Kanton goes for the pin ...
DJ: Phew, that was beyond close, how could Black kick out after that missed Senton Bomb? I thought that he was out for the night .....
TB: Well, he may just be out for the night now, Kanton definetly has the advantage right now, even though his back and ribs are damaged by not only that hard Steel Pipeing, but that Steiner Recliner that he was in for a good while there. Kanton has that pipeing now, and he is taking out Blacks Knee with it !! He continues to hit that knee !!! These two are shortening their careers every move here ....
Lorin: Alright Jim Ross, it will be ok, they are supposed to shorten each others careers, its there job ya know ....
TB: True, True .....
DJ: WHASSUP !!!!!!
DJ: Oh, I thought this was the Budweiser Commercial .....
TB/Lorin: Idiot .....
(Black hits away some more on that knee of Black, and then places it in a Figure Four. Black screaming in pain, but he wont give up. Kanton streches it out some more, still, Black wont give up. After one last strech, Kanton lets go of the hold, but goes for the pin, hooking both legs and leaning on Blacks shoulders as much as possible ...
Black barely gets the right shoulder up. Kanton drags Black down the ramp and back towards the ring. Kanton trys to whip him into the ring about 3/4 of the way back down, but Black reverses, driving Kanton back into the ropes on the outside, but Black is sprinting as hard as he can towards Kris. Kanton with an attempt at a
Backdrop into the ring, but Black does an amazing handstand/DDT combo on the ropes, and Kanton is out. Black goes for the pin .....
DJ: These two have seriously beat the crap out of each other, and that was one of the best counters to any move that I have ever seen !!!
TB: They are definetly two of the best athletes this federation has to offer to be so new. Black throws Kanton back into the ring now, possibly going for that "Hells Bells" Downward Spiral Finisher of his. But dont count Kanton out, he is definetly still in this. Black whips him into the ropes and trys for a clothesline, but Kanton ducks under and goes into the other side ropes. He trys for a Standing Sunset Flip, but Black catches his legs as he trys the flip !! He is gonna end this right here, driving Kantons head into the mat with all his power. Kanton trying desperately to get his legs free and knock Black into the Sunset Flip, but Black is going for a Powerful spinebuster. But wait, Kanton hooked Blacks stomach as he was getting flipped back over, he has the Jack-Knife setup perfect !!! He nails the Fear Effect !!! He goes for the pin immediately
3NO! BARELY A KICKOUT! GOD HAVE MIGHTY ON THESE TWO! THAT TOOK ALL KANTON HAD LEFT TO GET THE FEAR EFFECT ON BLACK FROM THE POSITION HE WAS IN!!!!
(Neither man is moving after that Jack-Knife Powerbomb on Black. The ref cant do the Ten Count, so he just sits in the corner Twiddling his thumbs waiting for these two to get back up. Kanton is the first to his feet, but Black is up just as quick after being nailed with that finisher. Kanton trys a Thez Press again, but Black nails him with the Hells Bells as he is in midair !!! He goes for the pin ....
3NO! Kickout! Kanton barely got the left shoulder up!)
Lorin: This has actually been one of the best matches I have ever seen !!!
DJ: Yeap, I would have to agree ....
TB: It isnt over yet though, they are both still down, but Black is rolling around in the ring holding his Ribcage. He has to have a couple broken ribs at least after all the punishment he took from the Pipes and that missed Senton Bomb and such a while ago. Both men back up now, they whip themselves into the Ropes, DOUBLE
CLOTHESLINE! Their both down !!!!!!
DJ:This has been a definite great showing!
Lorin:Wait! Look! It's Azrael Damodred! He hits the ring, and He just dropped a double elbow drop! The referee can't do anything about it! Azrael grabs Black... MAXILMILLION!
TB:Azrael Damodred pulls Kanton on top of Black, 1-2-3! Kris Kanton wins!
DJ:And Azrael is putting the boots to Kanton... we've got to go to break!
Azrael Damodred vs. Donnie Daze
TB: We're back!
Lorin: It's time for the hardcore match!
TB: Azrael Damodred's up against the red hot Donnie Daze.
DJ: He's hot in more ways than one. Didja see what he did to Douglas Howland?
TB: We were THERE, of COURSE we saw it!
Lorin: Let's go to the ring and start this match, shall we?
*ding, ding, ding*
Ring Announcer: Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is scheduled for one fall!
("Pardon Me" by Incubus plays as Donnie Daze comes out to cheering.)
Ring Announcer: First, from Port St. Lucie, Florida, weighing in at 235 pounds... the master of the branding iron... DONNNIEEEE DAAAZZZEEEE!!!
Lorin: Well, Donnie may have come off to a rocky start here in the IML2, but he's evened the score with Douglas Howland, and they'll finish their feud at the pay-per-view. He may be overlooking Azrael Damodred, though.
DJ: Which Azrael? The first one or the second one.
TB: She means the one with the last name.
("Pardon Me" stops playing. "The Beautiful People" by Marilyn Manson begins playing, as Azrael Damodred comes out to a mixed reaction.)
Ring Announcer: His opponent! From Flint, Michigan, weighing in at 275 pounds... AZRAEL DAMODRRREEEEDDDDD!!!!
DJ: Now, what's the difference between this Azrael and the one without a last name?
TB: A couple of pounds, I guess.
*ding, ding, ding*
DJ: And here we go! Damodred and Daze lock up, and Daze catches him with a drop toe hold!
TB: Daze is going to need his speed advantage in this match.
DJ: They lock up again, and Damodred overpowers Daze into the corner! The referee is ordering a break.
Lorin: Well, they get a break, but Damodred sucker punches Daze in the corner. He now sends Daze in... no! Daze jumps on the top rope, springs back, corkscrew moonsault! Daze caught Damodred with an impressive move!
DJ: Daze now, comes off the ropes, and, oh! Damodred catches Daze with a clothesline!
TB: Now, Damodred is taking Daze up top!
Lorin: He's going for the Maximillium, already, in this match!
DJ: No! Daze backdrops Damodred to the canvas! What a fall!
TB: Now Daze climbs up... leaps off for an elbowdrop... and misses! Damodred moved out of the way!
Lorin: And now, Damodred picks Daze up off the canvas, and a powerbomb! Damodred for the cover!
TB: One... two... no! Daze kicked out. Now Damodred picks Daze back up, and sends him off the ropes... going for a clothesline, no! Daze grabs the arm, flips around, DDT!
Lorin: Damodred got knocked senseless!
DJ: Damodred was senseless enough, as it was.
TB: Now, Daze is looking for the Dazed and Confused! But a low blow by Damodred interrupts it!
Lorin: What the... it's Azrael! Azrael is coming down to ringside!
DJ: No! Azrael's already in the ring!
Lorin: THE OTHER Azrael! He's coming down the ringside!
DJ: Oh! But what's he doing here?
TB: Three words... Mystery Death Match. Azrael meets Azrael and Kris Kanton in a three-way Mystery Death Match.
Lorin: How confusing.
TB: Damodred picks up Daze... Death Valley Driver! He goes for the cover, but he sees the other Azrael! He's distracted!
DJ: Wait a minute! From behind! Kris Kanton hits Azrael with a lead pipe!
Lorin: But look at the confused look on Kanton's face! He's not sure if he hit the right guy!
DJ: Kanton's run to the back, now, and, wait a second! Daze comes up to behind Damodred... DAZED AND CONFUSED (Inverted X Factor) ON DAMODRED! DAZED AND CONFUSED! Daze for the cover! One... two... three!
Ring Announcer: Here is your winner... DONNIE DAZE!
("Pardon Me" by Incubus starts playing as Daze climbs to the second rope and raises his arms in victory.)
Lorin: That was a confusing match. Give me something less confusing, like the Main Event.
DJ: What the hell? Douglas Howland has run into the ring! We haven't seen him since he lost to Daze on Friday! He's got that branding iron! Oh! Daze just got knocked out by that shot with the branding iron, from
TB: What the?! Dear god! Howland's set that branding iron on fire! He's going for revenge on Daze! He wants to brand Donnie Daze!
Lorin: Look at the officals pouring into the ring! They're going to try and keep Howland from branding Daze! And they got the iron from him!
DJ: How insane.
(I Love Smooth Operatorâz by T.Q. Smooth starts over the speakers as T.Q. Smooth himself makes his way down to the ring.)
TB- T.Q. Smooth looks in excellent condition as he is set to face Nucking Futs for a chance to advance his career in IML2 farther.
DJ- Are you referring to Futs or Smooth.
Lorin- It doesnât matter who he is talking about cause both have a good chance to advance in the stats. The winner makes his way up the ladder while the lose stay at the bottom of it.
TB- Well that was very enlightening Lorin.
Lorin- Thank you.
(Suddenly Nucking Futs jumps from under the ring to the outside of the ropes and sneaks up behind T.Q. Smooth.)
TB- Nucking Futs was under the ring!! And he is right behind Smooth.
DJ- Smooth look out!!!
TB- T.Q. turns around but is clothes lined by Futs.
DJ- Oh man!
TB- Futs picks up T.Q. and whips him to the ropes. Thereâs the head siscors take down by Futs sending Smooth to the canvas.
Lorin- Futs now has the upper hand from that sneak attack earlier in the match.
TB- Futs picks up Smooth again and whips him to the turn buckle.
DJ- And now he is connecting with punches as the crowd chants on.
TB- T.Q. has really taken a beating from Futs now show boating to the crowd.
Lorin- But again it was because of the sneak attack.
DJ- Are you suddenly on my side for once Lorin?
Lorin- No, I just believe it really effected the match.
DJ- Thank you God.
TB- Futs now hoists Smooth to the top rope and looks like he is setting up for a huricarrana.
DJ- If he pulls this off its over I know.
TB- He hooks him up........and........T.Q. Smooth is holding onto Futs not letting him fall.
DJ- He goes off the turn buckle........POWER BOMB!!!!!!!!!
TB- T.Q. Smooth managed to pull off a power bomb on Futs from attempting a huricarrana and now both men are to the ground.
Lorin- I thought he was gonna be out right there.
DJ- But like I always am I know who can do it.
Lorin- Sure, sure.
TB- The ref makes it to the 6 count as Smooth begins to get up.
DJ- Futs follows....
TB- T.Q. hooks up Fut.....it looks like hes going for the T.Q. special.
Lorin- He wants to kick him while hes down.
(Suddenly Fletcher Jamison enters from behind the ring with a chair.)
TB- Thats Fletcher Jamison with a steel chair.
Lorin- Whats he doing?
TB- T.Q. turns around and is clocked by the chair to the face sending Futs down to the mat.
DJ- The ref calls for the bell!! T.Q. wins but by interference by Fletcher Jamison.
Lorin- Why did he do that?
DJ- Either way is now pounding on Smooth and the ref is trying to stop it.
TB- The ref is clocked by the chair in trying to stop the assault on smooth.
Lorin- Now Futs is up and also pounding on smooth.
TB- Here comes B.J. Smith and Kyle Kash holding off Fletcher and Futs.
Lorin- This donât make sense. Why are all these men involved in this match?
DJ- T.Q. Smooth won. This ainât a match its a war.
(The Winds of Change then dodge the ring and start sending everyone over the ropes.)
TB- It's Tempest Malone and Riot Phillips.
DJ- The Winds of Change are clearing house here in the ring.
Lorin- What does it all mean? I am totally clue less.
TB- All we know is that T.Q. Smooth could have won the match on his own but won by D.Q. on the part of Fletcher Jamison.
DJ- Maybe Jamison was trying to defend Futs.
Lorin- Is that possible?
TB- Anything is possible in the IML2 Lorin. The question is why?
DJ- Well Iâll tell ya one thing Im gonna find out.
TB- The ring has now been cleared as referees and security clear the area so we can actually proceed with the show tonight.
TB: And we're back!
DJ: Must you do that EVERY segment?
TB: Yes, it's my job.
DJ: It's a rather crappy one.
Lorin: Crappier than getting smacked every segment, like this?
DJ: Umm...no ma'am.
TB: Well, up next we have the World Tag Team Title Match! Winds of Change
defend against The Eastsiderz! All 4 men are in, let's get this shiz
*DING DING DING*
TB: And we're underway! All four men begin to brawl! Tempest Malone and
Mike Stima are brawling on the outside, which would make The End and
Riot Phillips the legal men in the ring!
DJ: The End sends Phillips in..SPINEBUSTER! Cover! 1...2...NO! Almost
had new tag champs!
Lorin: The End allows Phillips to get up, BIG mistake! Phillips catches
The End with a bulldog, then makes the tag to his partner, Mike Stima.
TB: Stima in with a BIG crossbody on The End. Stima goes to the middle
rope, BIG fist drop! Cover, 1...2..NO! Someone pulled the ref out! Who
Lorin: NUCKING FUTS! IT WAS NUCKING FUTS! AND FLETCHER JAMISON, III!
They're attacking the Tag Team Champions!
DJ: And The Eastsiderz are in the brawl as well! This is just total Mayhem
TB: This could possibly be a preview to the PPV, 3-way dance for the
Tag Team Titles!
DJ: It's going to go down this Sunday, and for sure, hell's going to
TB: We'll be back!
(We fade back into Monday Night Melee.)
TB:Well, up next we've got the now Geoff Paul fighting Shawn Arrows for the Hardcore title!
DJ:Geoff is a former champion, as his former persona Guff Daddy.
Lorin:I think Geoff doesn't want to seem unoriginal... so he's using his real name.
DJ:That shows no imagination at all!
TB:Who cares! This is going to be one hardcore champion fighting a former Hardcore Champion! This will definitly be a good match.
("Guerilla Radio" by Rage Against the Machine starts up over the pa system as out from the back walks Geoff Paul, all alone. He gets into the ring, as "Cemetary Gates" by Pantera starts up. Ford walks onto the entranceway.)
President Ford:Hey Geoff. I've been hearing things that you're going to try to take out Arrows before the pay per view, and win back the hardcore title? Well, no offense, but you're one of the four number one contenders, and we can't have a number one contender for the world title fighting for a Hardcore title!
Geoff Paul:Get to the point Ford.
President Ford:It clearly states in the rulebook that number one contenders can not win a title other than the world or tag team titles while number one contender. Therefore Geoff, you can't win the Hardcore Title here tonight, that is, if you want to keep your World title shot this sunday!
Geoff Paul:That's not fair!
President Ford:I can't change the rulebook on short notice, sorry Geoff.
TB:Ford's been really enforcing that rulebook, and that rulebook just cost Geoff the hardcore title!
DJ:Yeah, but wouldn't you rather have the world title than the Hardcore?
TB:True, Guff is the last man to fight WHOEVER the champion is by the end of the night. He's definitly going to have a huge advantage over all other four men. Let's go to another break!
Enfirno vs. Kyle Kash
*Special Guest Referees:Lance McNally and Mac D.
TB:Well, we are at the main event, and I'm sure this match will definitly be huge for the pay per view this weekend. Enfirno and McNally are going to be fighting inside that spiral tournament, as Mac D. is the new Atlantic champion, defeating none other than Kyle Kash on Frostbite.
DJ:I know Kash wants at Mac's throat, and we all know Enfirno is not happy with McNally. Remember the entire build up to the ppv last month? This match is going to be "hot and heavy."
Lorin:Why are we still here! Let's get to the ring!
(Fade into the ring with Chris Astro.)
CA:This next matchup, is your MAIN EVENT! It is scheduled for one fall, and television time remaining. Introducing first, from Irving Texas... the special guest referee, Atlantic Champion Mac D.!
("Break Stuff" by Limp Bizkit hits the pa system as Mac D. makes his way to the ring. He has the gold on his shoulders.)
TB:OH! Kash is not going to like that! That's like taunting him in the face with twenty two pounds of gold!
CA:And his other special guest referee. He hails from Pittsburgh, PA, and is both the current, and three time former WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION! Here is LANCE MCNALLY!
("Take On Me" by Reel Big Fish starts up as McNally walks out from the back, holding the gold high in the air. The fans immediatly cheer for McNally, as he gets into the ring. Mac D. and McNally stare each other down.)
DJ:And Enfirno isn't going to care for McNally much either! It was last month when McNally screwed Enfirno out of the world heavyweight championship!
CA:And introducing first, from Pembroke Pines, Florida, he weighs in tonight at 245 pounds, and is accompanied to the ring by Nucking Futs, Fletcher Jamison, BJ Smith, and Robbie Hart. Here is KYLE KASH!
("Never Dies" by Creed starts up as Parental Advisory walks out from the back. Kash has a mean look in his eye, as BJ Smith is staring at his own reflection in the mirror of the platinum title.)
Lorin:What a bunch of weirdos.
TB:I'd have to agree. We got a snobby "The third" in Fletcher Jamison. We've got a man who switched the first letter in his names to be cute. And then we've got the strangest one of all. A man who does the most insane acts imaginable, BJ Smith.
DJ:BJ Smith cracks me up, you know that?
(BJ Smith takes a seat at the announce team.)
BJ Smith:Don't ever do that again...Has anyone ever ate cheese?
BJ Smith:AHAHA, I got you to say you cut... oh wait... let me try that again!
TB:You're not welcome BJ, now get out of here.
BJ Smith:Really? I'm not welcome? Well, let's play a hand of blackjack to decide if I stay or not, shall we?
(BJ Smith pulls cards out of his pants pockets, and deals to Baines. Smith has an up card of 2, and Baines has an up card of seven.)
TB:Hmmm... hit me.
(Baines recieves a four, as he stays.)
BJ Smith:I think I'll stay.
TB:Wait a second... you have 2, unless you have an ace, you can't beat what I have laid out here!
BJ Smith:Did I ever tell you how to play Blackjack Baines?
(They flip up the cards. BJ Smith has a five, while Baines has 21.)
BJ Smith:DAMN! I thought living dangerously would work!
TB:Now would you leave?
BJ Smith:Okay... I guess... PLATINUM! Yeah! Woo-hoo! I'm Platinum champion and your not Baines!
BJ Smith:Yeah buddy?
TB:That's not leaving...
(BJ Leaves as the camera hits the ring again.)
CA:And Kyle Kash's opponent. He hails from pittsburgh, PA, and weighs in tonight at 235 pounds... ENFIRNO!
("Witching Hour" by Mysery starts up over the pa system as out from the back walks Enfirno. He recieves a pretty good reaction, as he hits the ring. He goes right after Kash with rights.)
*Ding, ding, ding*
TB:Well, now that BJ is out of here, let's call the match. Right hands by Enfirno sends Kash realing into the corner. Enfirno grabs Kash and throws him back out, Enfirno comes charging in with a clothesline!
DJ:Kash stumbles out of the corner, Enfirno grabs him from behind, belly to back suplex on Kash! Stayed on for the pin, 1-2-NO! Kickout by Kyle Kash!
Lorin:You saw McNally didn't go for the count there, as Mac D. had to do it.
TB:I think that was a little fast by Mac.
DJ:What do you expect! Mac D. HATES Kyle Kash! He hates BJ Smith, he hates the entire Parental Advisory stable!
TB:The Parental Advisory stable is going to have a huge night at the ppv. Tag Team title match, 2 out of three falls with Razorback. And that four corners match for the atlantic title.
DJ:Look! Kash grabs a right hand from Enfirno, chops to the side of Enfirno's head, and Enfirno falls to the mat.
Lorin:Kash drops a quick right hand into the sternum of Enfirno, cover, McNally with the count, 1-2-NO! Kickout by Enfirno at the last second.
TB:Kash grabs Enfirno, and tosses him off the ropes, no, reversal... Kash comes back, CANDLE-KICK! CANDLE-KICK TO KASH! Kash is out! Enfirno falls down.
DJ:Enfirno is slowly crawling over to Kash... and draps his arm over Kash, 1-2-NO! Kyle Kash just kicked out of the Candle-Kick!
TB:I have a new found respect for Kash.
Lorin:Enfirno is in the face of McNally, who was the one making the count. He's smaking his hands making a three count gesture... roll up from behind by Kyle Kash! 1-2-NO! Enfirno kicks out, and gets up.
TB:That was a fast count by McNally.
DJ:McNally doesn't care, Kash turns Enfirno around, kick to the gut, double underhook suplex up and over! Kash crawls over and drapes his arm over, 1-2-NO! Enfirno gets his left shoulder up!
Lorin:Kash is picking up Enfirno, but Enfirno nails Kash with shots to the gut, and one huge one knocks Kash into the corner to the face. Enfirno grabs Kash in a headlock, and twists his body. He's going for the Candle-Wax!
TB:NO! Kash reverses it, and tosses Enfirno off his head! And Kash puts him between his legs... He's going for Too Late! NO! Enfirno pulls Kash's legs out from under him. Enfirno goes for a quick elbow but Kash moves out of the way, and then grabs Enfirno by the neck... Flipping neck whip!
DJ:Enfirno's neck just snapped! That sound was damn near sickening!
Lorin:You probably enjoyed that!
DJ:Of course I enjoyed it... it's pain! BLOOD!
TB:Kash is in control of Enfirno right now, as he grabs Enfirno to his feet. He whips Enfirno, no, reversal...
TB:DEAR GOD! Mac D. just knocked Kyle Kash's lights out with that steel chair! Look at that chair!
DJ:HAHAHA! Good one!
Lorin:The rest of Parental Advisory are trying to hit the ring, but Mac is fending them off.
TB:McNally comes over to ask why he did what he did... MAC D. JUST COLD CLOCKED MCNALLY WITH THE CHAIR!
TB:I don't know if he knew it was McNally or not!
DJ:Of course he knew it was McNally! Everyone knew it was McNally!
Lorin:I don't think Mac did!
DJ:Of course he did!!!
TB:Enfirno is up, and he grabs Kash, and pulls him on top of him?!? Mac D. drops down, 1-....2-....
DJ:COUNT DAMN YOU!
Lorin:Mac D. won't count! BJ Smith hits the ring, PLATINUM TITLE TO THE FACE OF MAC D.! BJ Smith grabs his arm, and slaps it down on the mat! 3!
*Ding, ding, ding*
TB:Enfirno just let Kash win! And look! Mac D. is out cold! Parental Advisory is riding high into this pay per view this sunday!
DJ:LOOK! WINDS OF CHANGE! AGAIN! WHY!
Lorin:T.Q. Smooth runs out following! And here come the Eastsiderz!
TB:We've got to go, for Duce, Lorin, and myself, and the entire IML2, SEE YOU IN BERLIN!
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