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Monday Night Meltdown
Live from the Civic Center
January 15th, 2001

Main Event
World Title Matchup
Dumpster Match
Phelen Kell -c- vs. Donnie Daze vs. Syphon Fission
*Daze just doesn't seem to fair well with the IWO superstars and garbage, but now, we're going to see if he can finally get over his garbage problem, and maybe even win the World Title in the Process. We figured that Syphon Fission is the Number One Contender, we should see if we can take the belt off of Kell. Kell, good luck.*

North American Title Match
Spaz -c- vs. Marvin "Birdman" Garvins
*The winner of the match on Friday will face off against one of the crazier wrestlers inside the federation. After a long run as Extreme champion, he now gets his shot at the second highest championship in the company. Will he be able to capitalize on the mark, and thrust himself into the Tournament on Hostile Takeover as champion?*

Barbed Wire Match(Adam Wars)
Psycho Jay vs. Ken War
*These two have been exchanging words all week, and finally we get to see them inside the IWO ring. These two are considered legends, and we'll see how legendary they are inside the confinds of a ring surrounded with barbed wire.*

Extreme Title Match(Seaman)
Zero Gravity Match
Mac D. -c- vs. Jax Stone vs. Justin Shack
*Jax has considered himself an "Extreme mofo," we'll see if he can take the belt from a former friend in Justin Shack. These two returning wrestlers battle it out for one of the most hardcore and grusome championships in the league, the Extreme title. Mac D. messed this match up, so he gets to defend his title against Shack and Stone ;-)*

Pacific Title Match(Tod)
AWS Man(Also Known as Bill) -c- vs. Rob Kestler
*These two have had war after war for the Pacific Title, and this right here could be Cyanide's last shot at "Pac-Man" glory. We'll see if one half of Bastards Inc. capitalizes.*

Intercontintal Tag Team Title Match
Team V.I.A.G.R.A. vs. Gunnar Smith & Sam Potright -c-
*V.I.A.G.R.A. doesn't seem on the right pace ever since Davis returned, and they've been forced to team with one another. Let's see if they can take the Intercontinental Tag Team Title Straps*

Suicide Kings vs. Shawn Arrows & Onslaught
*The Suicide Kings are wishing to take a tag team to their limit, and we figured that since Arrows and Onslaught have seemed to developed a friendship coming from a feud in the IML2, maybe they could be the opponents. Good things can only happen.*

Scott Morris vs. Simon Seaman
*After a beautiful rumble victory, Seaman seems to have drifted away from IWO competition. We'll see if he can take one of the men that took Titan to the limit, as Seaman battles Scott Morris. And yes, we didn't forget about Seaman's US Title match.*

Scott Stone vs. Shawn Carter
*Carter decided to challenge Stone, simply because he's being the brunt of Stone's jokes. Let's see if Carter gets his revenge, or Stone continues to shock all.*

T.V. Title Match
Adam Wars -c- vs. "K-Mart" Kevin Martin vs. Anthony Giorgetti
*These two started off their IWO careers with a double debut match, and quickly Adam Wars has captured gold. Can Giorgetti take it away from him, and defeat Wars this time? And we figured Martin should get a rematch at the title, since it is only fair. Of course, will the G.I. Joe fanatic take back the title he originally won?*
=======================================
(We see none other than the IWO logo slowly fade in and out of the screen, while we hear the familiar heartbeat pulsate throughout the television speakers. This repeats three times as slowly, the logo stays on the screen. Then, a bolt of lightning comes from the sky, erupting the logo into flames...
"Last Dance with Mary Jane" by Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers is heard softly behind the background noises, as we see Spaz once again standing tall over the fallen Flyer, as we see Davis in the background snickering. We see Sam Potright and Gunnar Smith with the Intercontinental Championships in their hands, as Capital Punishment and Dane Matthews are shown brawling. We see a mirror image of Syphon Fission being hit with the Dark Side of the Moon, as Kell was seen on the apron...
Fade into the O-Rena inside Chicago, Illinios, as we hear the cords from "Spiral" by Godsmack. The camera pans around the arena, as it eventually focuses itself onto none other than Max Riot, Jason Storm, and Ashley Keller, all three of them finely dressed.)

Max Riot(MR):Folks, Monday Night Meltdown, this show will definitly...

Jason Storm(JS):Rock the body that Rocks the party!

Ashley Keller(AK):Will you please shut him up Max?

MR:No time Ashley, we've got one hell of a show here tonight. We've got Spaz defending his North American Championship against none other than Marvin "The Birdman" Gardens!

JS:Dude, that's not the biggest match of the night. Donnie Daze, freakin' Mr. Mediocre himself, gets a shot at The Legend and the Number One Contender!

AK:That's right, Daze takes on Kell and Fission at Daze's front yard in a Dumpster Match!

(We fade into the back, as we see none other than Donnie Daze almost freakin' out. He has his Giant's hat on his one hand, trying to snap out the sweat from his brow.)

Donnie Daze:Oh man, this match, this match! Joey! Dear god! I'm on freakin' cloud nine!

(Joey Legion punches Daze across the mouth. Daze reals back and grabs his jaw.)

Donnie Daze:What the hell was that for!

Joey Legion:I wanted to make sure you knew this wasn't a dream.

Donnie Daze:The Conventional way is the pinch someone Joey, and I said I was on Cloud Nine, not ON a cloud!

(We fade back into the arena, as we hear "Hail to the Chief" blast out of the Pa system. We see none other than IWO Vice President Thomas Ford walk out from the back, dressed out in a brand new IWO suit, with the logo covering it in a diagnal fashion. Ford makes his way to the ring.)

IWO Vice President Thomas Ford:Internet Wrestling Organization... It is a FINE Day for me to be here, hosting Monday Night Meltdown for you all while Vice President Evan recovers from his problems.

MR:Problems? I don't think Evan has problems right about now.

IWO VP Ford:Now, there are a couple of issues that I need to address, and I need to do that, here and now. Many of you fans, and even the wrestlers, know of some of the backstage problems that the board, and the federation is currently having. Poor events, bad booking, even worse angles, well, it ends tonight. Tonight, the VP Evan stage, ends, and MY power begins...

JS:Oh boy.

IWO VP Ford:Tonight, the IML2 style, the IML2 flare, takes aim at the IWO. The IWO won't be the same, it will be a NEW IWO, which is a change we've needed for a long time. A change away from the Jamie Kosoy Anti-Federation stance. A Change from the Evan Levine domination. THE TRUCK STOPS HERE! The Truck ends here, and the reign is destroyed. Tonight, prepare for the show that starts all shows, the show that REALLY begins the New Millenium. Folks, prepare to be blown away, because I AM IN CHARGE, AND WHAT I SAY GOES!

("Closer" by Nine Inch Nails hits the PA System, as we see the Internet Wrestling Organization's Vice President Evan walk out from the back, microphone in hand.)

MR:Oh no, not another feuding board issue.

IWO Vice President Evan:Ford, who do you think you are? What power do you think you have? Do you truly believe that you and your IML2 could ever match up to the power of the IWO? Come on Ford, answer me.

IWO VP Ford:Well, truthfully, I believe it can, especially as of now. But, I'm not bringing the IML2 to the IWO, I'm bringing the STYLE, the flare, and everything that made the IML2 what it was, to the IWO. All the positives, and none of the negatives...

IWO VP Evan:Wel...

(Vice President Ford cuts off Evan at his pass.)

IWO VP Ford:Oh yeah... Evan? I was always wondering something.

IWO VP Evan:Well, what is it you pompous arrogant power hungry monster?

IWO VP Ford:What in sam hell is your last name?

(Evan backs off, but finally gets the nerve.)

IWO VP Evan:That's not the point Ford, what you're trying to pull here is domination, and destruction of the IWO, the IWO I molded, and I won't let you!

IWO VP Ford:Listen "Ev-meister," your IWO is boring, mundane, and a total ripoff of WCW. You want our stock to cut itself in half again? You want to see our arena sales plument? I mean, why are were here in the O-Rena when we should be in the United Center. Your track record shows Failure... Mine? Success. Until you can show me something, you have no right to talk...

(Evan, obviously angered, leaves. Ford leaves as well, as we fade to a commercial break.)

**Commercial Break**

Opening Match
Shawn Carter vs. Scott Stone

MR: Okay, folks, it's time for...

AK: The most boring match ever! Good night!

{AK drifts off.}

RA: This match, is totally pointless. Let's bring out Scott Stone.

{Stone walks out to whatever the hell his music is.}

RA: And, (yawn),Shawn Carter.

{Shawn Carter comes out to whatever the hell his music is.}

MR: And this match is on.

{Stone and Carter lock up. Carter whips Stone off the ropes, and steps on the
back of Stone's shoe, causing him to tumble out of his shoe. Carter then
grabs the empty shoe and throws it at Stone's head.}

MR: What a vicious smash by Carter to Stone.

JS: This is so boring. But look at the size of those tits,

{AK smacks the hell out of JS, even in her sleep.}

JS: Ow. So, who's gonna win?

MR: I dunno, and I don't care.

{Suddenly, Stone ties his shoe, and spears Carter! Stone punches away
furiously, then pulls his foe up and attempts a Tombstone, but Carter slides
down his back and delivers a leg sweep kick, followed by a knee to the
throat!}

MR: This might actually become a decent match!

JS: Yeah, like Syphon Fission is gonna become World Champion?

MR: Yeah! Just you wait!

{Carter lifts his opponent, and knees him in the gut. Stone attempts an eye
rake, but Carter puts him in a wristlock and kicks him in the ass. While
Stone grabs his ass, Carter hits a bulldog! Carter then picks Stone up again,
and delivers a Jackhammer!}

1!

2!

MR: And a kickout right before 3! Told you this would be good!

JS: (Yawn)

MR: And look at this! Carter has his enemy Stone in a sleeper! OH MY GOD!
STONE COUNTERS INTO A SAMOAN DROP! THAT WAS HUGE!

JS: You suck.

MR: Shut up! Now, Stone grabs Carter! He has him on his shoulders, but Carter

tries to counter,AND HE DOESN'T! ELECTRIC CHAIR DROP BY STONE!

JS: Boring. So boring.

MR: BUT NO! CARTER ROLLS FORWARD! VICTORY ROLL! THIS COULD BE
OVER!

1!

2!

MR: And a kickout by Stone! Stone picks up Carter,is he going for Stoned?
HE
TRIES IT,but Carter hits an uppercut!

JS: OK, this sucks. I'm gonna sleep with you now, Ashley,

SMACK!

AK {in a dreamlike state}: Don't try it.

JS: DAMMIT! THIS IS WORSE THAN HELL!

MR: Carter now has Stone in an inverted facelock,Curtain Call in the middle
of the ring! Carter is going up top! This could be it! Carter for the
splash,and he connects! He stays on for the cover!

1!

2!

MR: But Stone just kicks out! Now Carter has him up, backroll cradle!

1!

2!

JS: Whatever,Stone kicks out.

MR: I thought you thought it was boring!

JS: And Stone now,STONED OUT OF NOWHERE! By the way,I had
nothing better to
do, Max.

1!

2!

MR:NO! Carter got his foot on the rope! Dear god! Dear god! Stone is arguing with the referee... What in same hell?

JS:It's Carter... he's... doing illicit drugs?

AK:That's Some sort of plant...

MR:That's a cigarette... Yes... a cigarette...*Max Gulps*

JS:Wait! Carter turns Stone around! Carter just stuck that blunt into the eye of Scott Stone! Stone falls over and Carter Rolls him up! 1-2-3!!!

Meygon:Your winner... SHAWN CARTER!!!

MR:What the hell?

(Carter asks for the mic, as Meygon gives it to him. He takes a puff out of the remnents of his blunt.)

Carter:Stone was the first step. Stone, you've been ragging me for months, and I've had it up to here, and you've been put into your place. Now, there's another man who can't stop the assault, who can't seem to figure out that I don't pick cotton.... PSYCHO JAY! I WANT YOU IN THE RING, NEXT MNM!

(Carter goes to leave the ring, as we see Jay's picture up on the IWO-Tron. He waves, as footage of a Midget Shawn Carter picking cotton is shown. Carter races to the back, obviously angered.)

**Commercial Break**

Television Title Match
Adam Wars -c- vs. "K-Mart" Kevin Martin vs. Anthony Giorgetti

JS: Alright here we go again. We have the three jobbers who can't seem to realize it going at each other once again. Anthony no one cares about
his
last name vs. K-Mart Kevin Martin former IWO TV champion which also no
one
cares about, and the man who is trying his best to bring respect back
to the
title but failing Adam Wars the TV champion. Oh look here comes Adam
now.

(-Dragula by Rob Zombie Begins to play. The crowd gets on their feet
and
gives Adam a very decent pop. Adam comes out from behind the entrance
curtain
and starts to work the crowd immediately. However half way down the
ramp his
arch rival Anthony comes out and nails him from behind-)

JS: HA! What a loser!

MR: That's not right. Anthony now is going to work on Adam right
away. Adam
tries to fight back but is already at a disadvantage. Adam had the
television
title over his shoulder and it dropped to the ground. Anthony hits Adam
in
the face. Adam takes another punch to the face. And another no wait he
ducked. Anthony turns and Adam hits him with a superkick! Anthony is on
the
ground stunned. Adam is working the crowd while walking towards him.

AK: Hey Anthony's got the TV title. Look out Adam! OHHH! Adam just
got nailed
right between the eyes with that belt!

JS: Hey he's bleeding. Anthony must have gotten him good. Adam is out cold.
Anthon is carrying him to the ring. He rolls him up and the bell sounds for
the beginning of the match and Anthony goes for the pin. 1...2...no! K-Mart
just came out of no where and pulled Anthony out of the ring. K-mart kicks
Anthony in the stomach and nails a DDT. K-Mart now goes into the ring and
starts to celebrate like he has already won. Now he's going for a cocky pin.
1...2...no Anthony manages to get in and break it up. Anthony and K-Mart in a shoving match now. Anthony pushes K-Mart and now K-Mart fires back with a right hand. Anthony stumbles back to the ropes and k-Mart clotheslines him over. K-Mart turns around and Adam nails him with a superkick!

AK: Where did he come from. I thought he was knocked out.

MR: Well he's not knocked out but he is hurt. K-Mart fell over the
top rope
on that superkick and it is giving Adam some time to pull himself
together.

AK: Yea but here comes Anthony back in the ring Adam goes for yet
another
superkick but misses and Anthony delivers a standing Dropkick. Adam is
getting up quickly though. He runs at Anthony and swings. Anthony ducks
while
grabbing Adam's arm. Anthony hooks Adam in the Sleeper hold, no wait
he picks
Adam up and hits a neck breaker drop. Anthony for the cover. 1...2...no
kick
out by Wars. Anthony picks Adam up. He tosses him off the ropes. Adam
comes
back and Anthony leap frogs over him. Adam stopped right behind
Anthony.
Anthony turns and is met with a boot to the stomach. Adam now hits a
perfect
cradle piledriver! Adam covers 1...2...no! Kick out by Anthony. Adam
runs
towards the ropes.

MR: Oh man K-Mart just pulled down the top rope and Adam came crashing
to the
floor. K-mart on the apron now. Anthony runs at him but K-Mart hits a
shoulder to the mid section. K-Mart now with a sunset flip over the top
rope
and has a pin. 1...2...no. Anthony kicks out and is up quickly. He
kicks
K-Mart in the head and K-mart is down. Anthony goes to the top rope and
goes
for a flying headbutt. NO! K-Mart moves and Anthony's head bounces
off the
mat. K-Mart is setting up for a powerbomb. He nails it!

JS: Wait Adam Wars is on the top rope! He jumps off and hits a flying
Frankenstiener on K-Mart! Adam is signaling that he's going to end
it. He
sets both men up side by side and hits a lionsault on both of them. The
cover
1...2...no both men kickout. Adam picks up Anthony. Anthony fires back
with
shots to the stomach. Now a shot to the head where Adam is still
bleeding.
Come on get him Anthony!

AK: K-Mart is getting back up and he hits Adam with a clothesline.
K-Mart and
Anthony now looking at each other. They shake hands! They are going to
work
together to eliminate Adam first then fight! This isn't right! K-Mart
now
whips Adam into the corner and it looks like they are setting up for a
Cut
Throat. That's the Suicide Kings finisher. If Adam is hit with this
he's out
of this match!

MR: No Adam hits a DDT on K-Mart! Anthony takes a swing at Adam but
Adam
ducks and knees him in the back! Now he hooks his head! This could be
Turning
the Tides! No Anthony flips behind Adam and knees him in the back! He
hooks
him now and German suplex! He holds on and hits another! And another!
And
another! This time he bridges it! 1...2...no! Kickout by Wars! K-Mart
is back
up now! Anthony and K-Mart hook Adam in a double suplex and hit it. The
cover
by Anthony. 1...2..no K-Mart pulls him off. K-Mart goes for the cover!
1...2..no he is pulled off! K-Mart is saying let's just beat him up
some
more! K-Mart sets Adam up in the corner. he whips him to the other
corner but
Adam jumps onto the turnbuckle and flips off landing behind K-Mart.
Adam
dropkicks K-Mart into the corner. Adam turns around and is met by
Anthony.
CROSSFIRE! CROSSFIRE! There it is we got a new champion! 1...2...3!
It's
over! Anthony runs and grabs the belt! He goes to the top rope and
celebrates
to the crowd!

AK: Wait the ref sees that Adam had his foot on the ropes. He is trying
to
tell Anthony that he didn't win! K-Mart gets up and puts Anthony on
his
shoulders! And Electric Chair drop! Anthony's head landed right on
the belt!
K-Mart with a cover! 1...2...no! Adam Managed to break up the count! He
throws K-Mart out of the ring. Adam goes to the top and hits a Swanton
Bomb
on Anthony. Adam goes for the cover! 1....2....3! Yes Adam won it!

Ring Announcer: Anthony has been eliminated from this match

JS: Oh yea! This match is elimination style! I guess Adam and K-Mart
forgot!
Good thing for Adam too, because otherwise he would have been gone a
while
ago.

MR:Giorgetti rolls out of the ring, I don't think he's moving. This isn't a good sign...

(EMT's come racing out, as the action in the ring stops. They board Giorgetti into a stretcher, and take him out.)

*Ding, ding, Ding*

AK: Well I guess the battle for the TV title continues and we have the
former
champion vs. the current one. K-Mart comes into the ring and seems to
be in
better condition then Adam at the moment. Adam is still bleeding from
that
shot he took to the head at the beginning of this match. Adam gets up
and
K-Mart kicks him in the stomach. K-Mart goes for a powerbomb. No Adam
rolls
through and hits a DDT! Adam now going to the top! He claimed to be the
Master of High-Flying when he first came, let's see if he can back
that up
here! He goes for a Drunken Hangover splash! NO! K-Mart moves out of
the way!
K-Mart shoots back up and Hits Adam with FALLING PRICES! 1...2...no!
Adam
kicked out! How the hell did he do that!

MR: Looks like K-Mart is going for another! NO ADAM floats over and
hits
Turning the Tides! The cover! 1....2....NO! K-Mart just kicked out of
Adam's
finisher! This is amazing! Kevin is up now. Wait what‚Äės this? There
seems to
be a big Wal-Mart smiley face coming down to ringside! He handed
something to
K-Mart! It looks like brass knuckles! What the hell is going on! K-Mart
is
about to punch Adam! No Adam kicks K-Mart in the stomach! K-Mart drops
the
knuckles! Adam ha them now! He is putting them on! The crowd is going
nuts!
Adam rears back! No the ref grabbed his arm! Adam is arguing and K-Mart
pushes Adam into the ref. The ref is knocked down. Adam gets up and
ducks a
punch. Adam sets up and NAILS K-MART IN THE HEAD WITH THEM! Adam goes
for the
cover. He threw the brass knuckles away. The ref is still down!

AK: Hey look at this! The big smile is back! He has a chair! He nails
Adam in
the back of the head! The big Wal-Mart smiley face is laughing! He
starts to
laugh and is running away. The ref gets up. He is checking both men.
They are
both knocked out! Who the hell is the winner! The ref is saying
something to
the announcer. We are going to hear an official ruling.

Announcer: Ladies and Gentleman this match has been ruled a no Contest
therefore Adam Wars remains IWO TV champion!

JS: That's Cheap!

MR:Quick Update, let's take it back to Busta Hymen...

(The camera fades to the back, as we see "Old School" Busta Hymen standing there with a microphone.)

Busta Hymen:Yes Max, we can see Giorgetti being rolled into the ambulance, right now, the doctors are saying he's lower rib cage has been crushed from that Swanton Bomb. Early reports also say that Giorgetti could be out of action for a while. Back to you guys up in the booth.

JS:What is this, a newscast?

**Commercial Break**

(We fade into the back, as we see Adam Wars holding the Television title. He whips the sweat off his brow, as we see Shawn Carter walk up to him.)

Carter:Yo man, you wanna hit this shit?

(Carter puts the blunt into the face of Wars, as his bloodshot eyes eerily look Wars in the eye.)

Wars:I think I'll pass for now...

Carter:All right, but it's your loss...

(Carter walks away, as Wars just stares. We see the "Blue Chipper" Scott Morris walk up.)

Scott Morris:I want a title! Give me title! I took Titan to a limit! Gimme!

(Morris walks away. It must be some kind of spaztic thing.)

Wars:Weirdo...

(Wars grabs a drink from the water cooler, as we see Eric Reed walk up, and knock Wars in the back of the head. Reed looks down at his work, and walks away.)

Simon Seaman vs. Scott Morris

MR: Here we go folks, for one of the opening bouts of the evening
will set
Scott Morris up against Simon Seaman. What do you guys think will
take place
in this match up?

AK: Well I personally think that it could go either way here tonight.
Both
competitors came to fight. I saw them both earlier in the
back.....total
focus. Both of them.

MR: Very true.....very true...and what about you JS? What do you
think?

JS: I think this one is going to be a total bore

MR: Yeah well..your opinion really doesn't count-SO ANYWAY

JS: HEY!

MR: Shut up...anyway! Here we go ladies and gentlemen...its time
for the
match. Let us go down to ringside as the announcer prepares to
introduce the
two competitors for this bout...

::Down to ringside.::

Announcer: Ladies and gentlemen..this bout is scheduled for one fall,
with a
thirty minute time limit...introducing first....

::A song begins to play as Scott Morris walks on to the IWO ramp
with a smirk
on his face. He walks down into the ring.::

Announcer: SCOOOOOOOOOOOOTT...MOOOOOOORRIS! And his
opponent....

::"I Just Wanna Love Ya" by Jay Z begins to pump as we see Simon
Seaman
running like a bat out of hell down to the ring and jumping, sliding
inside.
The bell rings.::

MR: AND HERE WE GO! They aren't wasting any time here folks!
They're going
right at it! Morris right now has the upper hand!

AK: He saw Seaman running down the ramp and he knew he had to
get the first
shot in or he was in trouble!

MR: Your right there for sure! And it seems to have worked. Morris
has
stomped that umph out of Simon Seaman as he lifts him up and
throws him to
the turnbuckle. Now Morris backs up to the other corner and goes
running at
Seaman with a lunging shoulder block! OH! Simon moves though!

JS: Morris wasted to much time there! What was he thinking?

AK: Seaman now picks Morris up off the mat. He's grabbing his
shoulder.
Seaman see's this and immidiately goes to work on the shoulder!

JS: He has him in a beautiful Surfboard positioned maneuver there.
To bad it
won't last.

MR: What?

JS: Watch.

AK: Seaman can't hold him up and has to release. Morris falls to the
mat
screaming about his shoulder. But Seaman doesn't leave up. He
stands and
begins to stomp on his opponents hurt shoulder. This is really smart
work by
Simon Seaman right here Max.

MR: Your certainly right there again! Seaman is going to town on
that
shoulder and isn't giving Morris a chance to regroup! Look at that!

AK: He has him up now into a DVD like drop and DROPS HIM right on
that
shoulder on the mat, and holds on to the arm. He drives the arm into
the mat
and his own knee into the armpit, pulling on the shoulder. Morris is in
some
trouble here. He's gonna lose this one if he doesn't move and
capitalize on
something soon!

::We see a shot of Morris lying on the mat wincing in pain as Simon
Seaman
drives his knee.::

MR: He lets go of the hold now and picks Morris up. OH! But Morris
finally
mounts an offense and low blows Seaman. He stands up and begins
to punch with
only his left hand. He is favoring that shoulder, and its plain to see
right
here.

JS: He just tried to punch with his hurt side. Whats he thinkin'?

AK: HEY it worked! Morris doesn't seem to be in much pain when he
punches. He
begins throwing lefts and rights! Left! Right! Left! Right! A kick to
the
stomach into a DDT! Morris is at it now! He gets right back up and
pounces on
top of Seaman punching at him from the mount position!

MR: Seaman rolls it over and gives Morris a knee shot to the groin
area for
his troubles! That haults the firey fury of Morris!

JS: Seaman is standing up and going in to the corner to get his
barings back.
Morris knocked the hell out of him there. He walks back in to the
center of
the ring and begins to lift Morris up.

AK: But Morris with another reversal Snapmares Seaman over his
shoulder to
the mat and slaps on a headlock. He holds it in place for a moment
but then
begins to stand up pulling Seaman up with him. He releases the hold
and
throws Morris to the ropes!

JS: OUCH!

MR: OH MAN! That had to hurt!

AK: Morris just drop kicked Seaman right in the knee's. And believe
me...legs
aren't supposed to bend that way.

MR: But it appears that Seaman is okay. He's standing up now and is
met by a
clothesline from Scott Morris. Morris drops a big elbow on Seaman
and quickly
pulls him back up to his feet.

JS: This has to be one of the most boring matches I've ever seen in
my entire
life.

AK: Oh what the hell do you know? This is an excellent match with
two
excellent competitors. Your just jealous that you don't have the
determination or penis size of either of the men in that ring!

JS: Hey you bitch why don't you say that again?

AK: I WILL!

JS: BRING IT ON!

MR: SHUT THE HELL UP! Back to the match now we have Scott
Morris in control.
He whips Seaman off the ropes again and ducks for a back body
drop but Seam
see's it coming and stops in his tracks! Simon grabs Morris' arm. Knee
to Facebuster!

JS: This Scott guy must be a jackass or something. That move
hasn't worked
in centuries!

AK: Ah well I gotta give the guy that one.

JS: Damn right.

MR: Seaman now back to work on the shoulder of Morris...

AK: Simon's pulling up Scott Morris to his feet Gut Wrench Shoulder
Breaker by Seaman!

JS: Where'd he get that from?

MR: Who knows! Simon yanks Morris to his feet by his
arms...Silencer! Simon with the cover! 1...2...3! Simon wins it!

(Seaman grabs a microphone.)

Seaman:Listen, I'm getting rather impatient with my United States title shot, and if I don't receive it VERY soon, I'm going to take it myself. Daze, I know you're busy in the back with your world title shot, but realize I want in the mix...

(Seaman throws the microphone down.)

**Commercial Break**

JS: Tag matches suck!

AK: What are you on now?

JS: It says here our next match is the Kings vs. Onslaught & Shawn Arrows.

AK: Sounds pretty decent to me...

JS: 'Sounds pretty decent to me'.... please

MR: Quit bickering... the Kings are former IWO Tag champs... and Onslaught is
the G.O.A.T!

JS:..Goat? I'm not even gonna venture there...but Arrows sucks doesn't he...

(The 3 look at each other.)

All 3: Exactly.

MR: Anyways, looks like it's time for the action.... let's go to the ring where
Meygon awaits...

(To the ring.)

Meygon: The following match is for one fall and is an IWO Tag Team Match.
Coming to the ring at this time... they are former IWO Tag Team Champions...
they are the Suicide...Kings!!!

('More Human than Human' plays and the crowd pops as the lights flash around
and the King brothers emerge from the back and slowly make their way to the
ring. They slide in and walk over to the corner and get ready... Ryan even tries
to score with Meygon, but fails miserably.)

Meygon: And their opponents.... coming to the ring at this time... the Greatest
of all time... the Epti...hell I'm not reading all thes, Onslaught and his partner...
Shawn Arrows!!!

(The instrumental version of 'Disposable Teens' comes on and Shawn Arrows
comes running from the back at hitting the ring, heading straight for the Kings,
Meanwhile Onslaught slowly makes his way out.)

MR: My God the action is already getting hot as Arrows trades blows with Ryan
King, but Jeff just caught him from the side with a knee and the two brothers are
pounding him down to his knees! Arrows is looking faded and the Kings come
off opposite ropes,,, wow! Double dropkicks to Arrows head and he crumples
over.

AK: Yes and Onslaught is just now to the ring and he just stands there and
Ryan leaps to the apron while Jeff works some more on Arrows neck area.

MR: He's got ole Arrows around the neck now with a side headlock and he
shoots Arrows off to the ropes, huh? Onslaught just pulled the top rope down
and Arrows flies over and down to the floor. Jeff looks confused and now
Onslaught is entering the ring.

AK: He's saying... looks like he's wanting a piece of the Kings himself. The two
are circling... now they lock up and Onslaught backs Jeff into the ropes and
makes a free break... no! Onslaught just smacked Jeff across the face. Jeff
pulls back and slaps On--wait he ducks and back suplexes Jeff up and
over...pin!

1...

2...

Kickout!

JS: Damn... this isn't over yet?

MR: Stay calm... these guys really have it out for each other. Onslaught pulls
Jeff up and lands a few rights and backs him over into the corner. He crashes a
few knees into the abdomen and folds Jeff over. He hooks the head and lifts Jeff
up for a vertical suplex but he drops him crotch first on the top turnbuckle.

JS: Look at Jeff's eyes...hahahah! Now Onslaught is climbing up...Jeff delivers
some body shots, but Onslaught hangs on and nails Jeff with a thundering
right... he's standing on the 2nd turnbuckle and he's hooking Jeff under the
arms...uh-oh...Belly to Belly, Overhead Suplex!

MR: Onslaught starts up to his feet but Ryan just zipped in through the ropes...

AK: Big Superkick to an unsuspecting Onslaught! Ryan is jawjacking as the ref
pushes him out, and on the other side Arrows is up on the apron and now
scaling to the top... he comes off with an elbow drop and covers. The ref turns
around but it telling Arrows 'No Tag!'

JS: But did Onslaught ever tag Arrows?

MR: Good point!

AK: Now Onslaught it up and he shoves past Arrows to Jeff... wait Arrows just
spun Onslaught around... Onslaught pushes Arrows back but Shawn shoves
back...Jeff is to his feet and Onslaught and Arrows just both spun around and
nailed him with rights! But Ryan shoots over for a double clothesline, but they
duck! Ryan keeps going and jumps into the corner and spins off with a spinning
heel kick, Onslaught ducks, but Ryan nails Arrows right in the jaw!

MR: Now he's up and Onslaught attempts the dropkick, but Ryan stops and
Onslaught gets all mat. Ryan grabs the ankles and stomps the mid section and
he pulls him to the center of the ring and sends Onslaught up with a slingshot
over the ropes, no! Jeff springs off the outside and catches Onslaught in mid air
with a somersault plancha!

JS: The Kings are cooking on all cylinders and Ryan is waiting for Onslaught to
get up... he is... Ryan lifts him over his shoulder and Jeff slides in with
connecting Phoenix Crusher! Don't they call that the 3-D?

AK: WWF terms... here it's the Cut-Throat...

JS: Oh... well anyways the Kings both cover and the ref slides in...please
God...

1...

2...

3......NOOOOOOO!!!! Kickout!

AK: My God....Onslaught kicked out...maybe this guy isn't a joke.

MR: The Kings are up and here comes Arrows...ohh, 3 way clothesline and now
all 4 men are down on their backs!

JS: COME ON REF! COUNT FASTER THAN ROBERT DOWNY JR GETS OUT
OF JAIL AND BUYS MORE CRACK!

AK:Jeff King is slowly rolling over! Jeff King drops the arm on top of Shawn Arrows! 1-2-3!!! Dear god! The Suicide Kings did it!

**Commercial Break*

Intercontinental Tag Team Titles
Team V.I.A.G.R.A.(Tony Davis & High Flyer) vs. Gunnar Smith and Sam Potright -c-

MR:We've got a huge tag team match coming up...

(We fade to the back, as we see none other than a 95 Ford Probe pull up into the arena. It goes over to the security guard, as we see it's none other than High Flyer.)

Flyer:Yo Guard, sorry I'm late, but I"ve just...

(All of a sudden, Flyer's car is blindsided, as we hear screaching tires and total shock.)

MR:DEAR GOD! DEAR GOD! FLYER WAS JUST T-BONED! T-BONED! DEAR GOD! GOOD GOD NO!!!

(The camera fades into the wreckage, as the door of the black mustang assaulter opens. Out falls Tony Davis, holding his shoulder.)

JS:TONY DAVIS?!?! WHAT IN SAM HELL!

(The Probe's door opens, as Flyer falls out. He has a huge laceration on his forehead, as he is holding his left elbow. Along with that, his leg seems to be contorted in a wrong fashion.)

AK:Oh god that is grusome!

**Commercial Break**

(We fade back, as we see Davis up, trying to walk it off. It is the same shoulder he had injured in the FWL. We see Flyer having being taken into an ambulance, as he has a neck brace on. They have a bad underneath his elbow, and his left knee is still buckled the wrong way.)

MR:Oh my god, this doesn't look good. This just doesn't look good. There is just something in the air tonight. First Anthony Giorgetti's career could be ended... now High Flyer's.

JS:That's a little Extreme Max, Giorgetti just has crushed ribs, he could be back, but not in the IWO...

MR:Flyer though... I mean, look at Davis. You can see the sincerness. He doesn't know what he did, or why he did it. I don't get it... I just don't get it.

AK:Flyer's quietly being rolled into the ambulance, as the fans here in the arena are just shocked...

MR:He was a great wrestler...

**Commercial Break**

Pacific Title Match
AWS Man(Also Known as Bill) -c- vs. Rob Kestler

MR: Looks like it's time for AWS Man (also known as Bill)'s Pacific Title
defense!

JS: Great! MORE BLOOD!

{"3.14" by The Bloodhound Gang plays, and AWS Man (also known as Bill)
enters
to a giant pop. He has Pen in his right hand and the Pacific Championship
around his waist, with Kilroy and the Nude in tow.

RA: The following contest is scheduled for one fall, and it is for the IWO
PACIFIC CHAMPIONSHIP! Making his way to the ring, weighing in at
200-something pounds, he is from Freakville, North Carolina, and he is the
Pacific Champion,AWS MAN (ALSO KNOWN AS BILL)!

{AWS Man (also known as Bill) climbs into the ring, while his managers wait
outside, with Kilroy holding Pen. Just then, "Stayin' Alive" as performed by
Ozzy Ozbourne cuts in, and the crowd pops yet again, as Rob Kestler arrives
with Cassie, just in time from his quest to eliminate Scott Stone's species.}

RA: And the CHALLENGER! He weighs in at 300-something pounds (I
think,),being accompanied by everyone's favorite farm girl, Cassie, he is an
ex-IWO WORLD CHAMPION! HE IS ROOOOOOOOB KESTLERRRRRRR!

{Rob climbs through the ropes, and shakes hands with his former stablemate.
They then begin to tear into each other.}

DING! DING! DING!

AK: AND THIS MATCH HAS BEGUN! ROB KESTLER'S DOMINATING IN THE
EARLY GOING!
LEFTS AND RIGHTS TO AWS MAN (also known as Bill)!

MR: Wait a minute, where's Jason going?

{Jason Storm has left his position at the announcer's table so that he can
pinch Cassie's ass! Cassie appears shocked, and when she turns around, she
sees Jason Storm grinning at his position!}

Cassie {inadvertently placing herself so that Jason can look down her
cleavage}: Now that's not very silly!

JS: Ohhhhhhhh,what's that, now?

AK: Perv. Back to the match!

MR: AWS Man (also known as Bill) hits the spin kick to the stomach of
Kestler! Kestler is kneeling! AWS Man (also known as Bill) goes off the
ropes! AX KICK! AX KICK ON KESTLER! The cover!

1!

2!

AK: And Rob Kestler kicks out with authority! AWS Man (also known as Bill) is
waiting for him to get up! Great sportsmanship by AWS Man (also known as
Bill)!

MR: These guys were stablemates, you know.

AK: Yeah! And AWS Man (also known as Bill) with a spear to Kestler!

{Suddenly, the aggressive auditory attack known only as the opening chords of
Mudvayne's "Dig" picks up. The crowd is puzzled, and then,they see a man,
about 6'4", 235 pounds, with spiked red hair, enter.}

MR: Who the hell is this guy?

AK: I dunno, but he's kinda cute!

MR: Well, whoever this guy is, he evidently came out to watch the match!

AK: Speaking of which,AWS Man (also known as Bill) is working on Kestler
in
the corner! Knife-handed chops to Rob Kestler! Kestler blocks! And a running
bulldog by Kestler! Kestler lifts AWS Man (also known as Bill) onto the top
rope! Rob is on the second rope! OH MY GOD! A 180 SKY HIGH BY
KESTLER! THAT
HAD TO HURT! NEW CHAMPION HERE!

1!

2!

2 ¬Ĺ!

MR: JESUS! AWS MAN (also known as Bill) SOMEHOW KICKS OUT!

AK: I have no clue how that could have happened. No clue whatsoever.

MR: Well, either way, AWS Man (also known as Bill) is one tough mother!

{Just then, Max Riot listens in as he receives a transmission from backstage.}

MR: Ladies and gentlemen, I have just been informed that this man at ringside
is Brian Blade, the IWO's newest prospect!

AK: Brian,Blade? He SOUNDS hot!

MR: Whatever. The referee is now attending to AWS Man (also known as
Bill),WHAT THE HELL! BRIAN BLADE IS IN THE RING! WHAT A THRUST
KICK TO THE
HEAD OF ROB KESTLER! THIS PLACE HAS TURNED AGAINST BRIAN
BLADE!

AK: Apparently, that's Blade's trademark move, the Cutting Edge!

MR: And look at this! Blade setting Kestler up for a neckbreaker! NO! HE
SNAPS HIS NECK AND HEAD DOWN INTO A DDT!

AK: That's called the Career Killer!

MR: BY GOD, ROB KESTLER HAS BEEN DESTROYED! AND NOW BRIAN
BLADE HAS THE
REFEREE DISTRACTED! AWS MAN (also known as Bill) TO THE TOP ROPE!
WIN THE
FREAKIN' MATCHIFIER! WIN THE FREAKIN' MATCHIFIER! THE REF
COVERS!

1!

2!

3!

RA: Here is your winner, and STILL IWO Pacific Champion,AWS MAN (also
known
as Bill)!

MR: Brian Blade is raising AWS Man (also known as Bill)'s hand! And now the
Nude and Kilroy are puzzled! Blade with a mike!

Brian Blade: IWO, I came here to escape the political power struggles in the
World's Finest Wrestling Federation. I came here to achieve the dominating
status I held in WFWF. I came here to make the name Brian Blade respected
and
feared by every man, woman and child that watches. And when I say child, you
count, Adam Wars! You count, Onslaught! You two ass-wipers make me sick! I

came here to rid the IWO of all you pussies that think you're big stars!
Phelan Kell, the most overrated man in the IWO! Syphon Fission, the second
most! And anyone that gets in my way,will get their career Killed.

{AWS Man (also known as Bill) grabs the mike.}

AWS Man (also known as Bill): So why the freak did you interfere in my
freakin' match?

Brian Blade: To turn,you,HEEL!

{The crowd gasps.}

AWS Man (also known as Bill): Oh freakin' K. Tod,you're not my friend
anymore! But I guess you can still come over and play bingo at my house on
Saturday, and watch porn with me whenever,

Brian Blade: Maybe you don't get the point of being heel. You have to
alienate all of your face friends!

AWS Man (also known as Bill): Freakin' really? I freakin' thought that you
did that by buying really scary-looking freakin' McDonald's Happy Meal toys!

Brian Blade: (sigh) You've got a lot to learn. Let's go.

{Blade and AWS Man (also known as Bill) exit, with AWS Man (also known as
Bill)'s managers in tow. The crowd still pops for AWS Man (also known as
Bill), even though he's 'heel' now.}

**Commercial Break**

( Camera's cut to the inside of Capital Punishments locker room..Where
Capital Punishment is lying back with Chairman Sean, talking over his
current
contract..There is a knock at the door)-

JT: Look, at Cappy working over that contract!

Nikki: Who's that knocking at the door?!

-( Capital Punishment goes to the door to answer..It's Dane Matthews!)-

GP: What's Dane Matthews doing at Capital Punishments lockerroom?!?

Dane Matthews:Hey you forget this Cappy...

JT: Dane Matthews is handing Cappy his half of the IWO World tagteam
title
straps..

Capital Punishment: Umm....Thanks..I guess..

-( Cappy goes to shut the door but is stopped by Dane.)-

Dane Matthews: CAPPY WAIT!

Capital Punishment: What now Dane?

Dane Matthews: You forgot this..

JT: Kick to the mid-section! Cappy is doubled over..Wait..DOWNTOWN
EXPLOSION
ON THE CONCRETE! WE'VE GOT BLOOOOOOOD!

Nikki: Oh geez.. Capital Punishment is busted open and is lying there
helplessly..Dane Matthews is now hovering over him..

Dane Matthews: Next week on Meltdown..Me and you Cappy..One on One
for both
of these belts! Your ass is mine bitch!

GP: OH MY GOD! Dane Matthews has just assaulted Capital Punishment!
What the
hell is his problem?

JT: He obviously wants those tagteam titles to his self!

Nikki: Did you think of that all by yourself?

JT: NO! I was staring at your tits!

GP: WEVE GOT MORE BLOOD! Nikki's just knocked JT out cold and given
him a
bloody nose! Watch out we've got more action on the way!

{Schitzo Tod steps out of a shuttle express to find Rob Kestler being treated
by EMT's. Tod runs over to him.}

Schitzo Tod: Rob!

{The EMT's hall Kestler off into a fake ambulence, and they drive awaw.
Donnie Daze then walks up to Tod.}

Donnie Daze: Hey Tod, what's up?

Schitzo Tod: WHo did that to Rob?

Donnie Daze: What? Oh. SOme new guy, along with AWS Man (Also known as
Bill).

Schitzo Tod: AWS Man (Also Known as Bill)?!

{Tod dashes off}

Donnie Daze: (sarcastic tone) Oh I'm fine, thanks for caring.

{Tod runs down the halls, then stops.}

Schitzo Tod: Blast, this is going to take me forever. If only I had some sort
of sign, leading me to AWS Man (Also known as Bill)'s locker room...

{Tod looks up at a sign that reads- straight ahead- AWS Man (Also Known as
Bill)['s secret "heel" locker room.}

Schitzo Tod: Oh...

{Tod walks into the room only to be on the head... By an inflatable hammer!}

Schitzo Tod: (just standing there) ...

AWS Man (Also known as Bill): That freakin' hurt you Tod!

Schitzo Tod: Oh! (falls down) The pain! The pain!

-( Camera's cut to commercial)-

Extreme Title Match
Zero-Gravity Match
Mac D.-c- vs. Justin Shack vs. Jax Stone

MR:Welcome back to Monday Night Meltdown. Next, we have quite a match for you.

JS:Like a GOOD one?

MR:Come on now! All IWO matches are grrrrrrreeeeeeaaaaaaaaattttttt!!

*THUMBS UP*

JS:Tell me something, are you going to get money for the plug you just did?

MR:Of course. The check is in the mail!

*THUMBS UP*

AK:Anyways folks, we do have a great match up for you. It's time for
the 'Zero Gravity Match' with the IWO Extreme Championship on the line yet again. It's Jax Stone, Justin Shack, and the extreme champion himself,
Mac D.!

MR:It doesn't get more exciting than this!

JS:But I thought you said that this was cra...

MR:NO I DIDN'T! Where did you get that idea?

JS:You just told me backsta...

MR:Anyways, this is going to be one crazy match.

AK:These three individuals will be placed in a enclosed area with no
gravity. With a weapon of their choice in hand and gravity boots, they
will fight for the coveted extreme title.

MR:Like no other match in the industry. Without further or do, let's
call this thing! They have all entered the box and the referee is in there
with them.

JS:Let's see what they are all carrying. Jax Stone has a chair in
hand. Former champion Justin Shack has an aluminum bat. Now what does Mac D. have in his possession. WHAT??!! Is that a stop sign I see??!!

MR:You're right. Mac D. has brought a stop sign!

JS:Did he just get that from outside the arena?

AK:It could be. Anything can happen, so let's start this battle.

*BELL RINGS*

MR:Well we just heard the bell ring from the timekeeper's table right
next to us here. I don't know if they heard it near the entrance where this
match is going to take place, but all three are going at it anyway.

JS:Here they go. They all drop their weapons with a three-way lock up
to start. A three-way lock up? I haven't seen that in ages. Anyways,
onto the match. They should watch out for those weapons though because they are now airborne. Here we go, they all break up the lock up. Mac D. pairs off with Shack. Kick to Shack's midsection. Mac D. with a front face
headlock on Shack and attempts a vertical suplex. Shack with a block. Mac D. with
an attempt for the second time, shack with another block. Here comes
Stone.
Stone hooks Shack from behind, toss up and a...german suplex! Shack
bounces off the floor and hits the wall. Not a great way to start this
match for Justin Shack. Meanwhile, Jax Stone and Mac D. exhange lefts
and
rights. Mac D. gains the advantage. A go behind by Mac D. and he
attempts
what appears to be another german suplex. Mac D. has him up and...HE
GOES
UP TOO. They are heading for the ceiling. Here it comes. Jax Stone
hits
head first into the ceiling! Mac D. goes to the floor. He sees Shack.
Shack charges. Mac sidesteps, Shack hits the wall. Shack staggers,
and Mac
D. connects with a back body drop. Shack bounces off the floor and
hits the
wall once again!

AK:Mac D now tries to jump up and get one of the weapons stilling
floating
around in there. Can he reach it? YES! He has the chair, but doesn't
see
Stone behind him. Stone with a kick to Mac's midsection and grabs the
chair
from Mac. Stone winds up, but Mac ducks. Stone winds up again, but
this
time, DOESN'T FAIL!

*SMACK*

AK:Stiff chair shot and Mac D. goes flying into the opposite wall.
Stone
catches Mac on his way back, another chair shot and...another chair
shot!
Stone holds Mac D. in place this time and hits, you guessed it, another
stiff chair shot. Just look at the intensity of those chair shots by
Stone
echoing through the arena. The crowd oohs and ahs with every shot.
This is
amazing, Mac D. isn't even bleeding. Jax Stone celebrates, but doesn't
see
Justin Shack behind him, Shack sneaks up and connects with a
neckbreaker.
Shack picks up Stone and throws him wildly into the air. The crowd
can't
believe it. Justin Shack goes after Stone with a series of punches in
mid-air. Stone is stunned momentarily. Shack grabs the aluminum bat
he
brought in the beginning of the match. Shack swings and CONNECTS!
RIGHT IN
THE FACE! Stone tumbles in mid-air! Shack swings wildly and Stone
goes
tumbling like a gymnast in mid-air once again!

MR:Mac D. is still on the ground out cold while the two men, Shack and
Stone, battle near the ceiling. Justin Shack has Jax Stone upright.
Justin
smacks Stone's head against the ceiling. He tries again, reversed by
Stone.
He tries once more, Stone smacks Shack's head against the ceiling for
a
taste of his own medicine. Jax attempts a DDT, but Shack doesn't give
and
Jax gets thrown to the ground and hits the floor pretty hard. The fans
are
starting to get into the match, but look at that. Justin Shack is
playing
to the crowd. Get to winning this match cause there hasn't been even
one
pin yet. Mac D. is finally on his feet. He grabs his stop sign and
sees
that Shack is distracted by this sold out crowd. Mac D. jumps, Shack
turns
around and...OOOOOOHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! The champion with a vicious shot
with
that stop sign to Shack's temple. Shack is the first one to bleed.
Mac D
has him again and with the stop sign in hand, hits a beautiful russian
leg
sweep onto the ceiling. Jax Stone is back up and goes after both men.
He
turns Mac D around, knife edge chop. WHOOOO! Another knife edge chop.
WHOOOO! He whips Mac D. into the wall, Mac stumbles. Jax has the stop
sign
now, but Mac grabs the chair floating in the air.

JS:Folks, this is quite a match we have here. Mac and Jax both have
weapons
in hand. What's gonna happen here? Mac swings, Jax blocks with the
stop
sign. Jax swings, Mac blocks this time. This is like something out of
Star
Wars...or Melrose Place! Mac swings and is hit with a low blow by
Stone.
Stone has the stop sign. Hit to the midsection! Hit to the chest!
Hit to
the skull of the champ. The trifecta in all it's glory. Mac is cut
wide
open.

AK:What is this? It's Justin Shack, in a bloody mess and all going
after
Jax Stone! He charges Jax and so does Mac D.! Jax better watch out or
he's
going to get seroiusly hurt. Jax sidesteps, and Justin Shack and Mac
D. hit
the ceiling heads first. THAT HAS TO HURT! Jax turns both of them
around
at once. He has them hooked. DDT? NO! They both reverse it. Stone
bounces off the wall. Stone on his way back, Mac and Shack try a
double
clothesline, Stone ducks. Mac and Shack try to charge Stone. Jax gets
them
hooked. Double DDT!! Double DDT!! Double DDT against the wall! Jax
is on
quite a roll. Will he capitolize? Yes, he does. He falls back down
to the
ground and pulls both men with him. All three men hit the floor. Jax
holds
the champ up. Jax attempts to get one of the three weapons from above.
Mac
D. hardly can stand up. Jax has his back turned. Mac D. with a cobra
clutch.

MR:A simple yet effective move by the champion. He is going to have to
set
the tempo down. Jax reverses with a mule kick and turns Mac around for
a
schoolboy! Will a new champion be crowned? Referee with the count...

1..........

2.........

THR...NO!!!!!!!!!!!!

MR:Jax and Mac are back up. Jax with a go behind on Mac, Mac reverses,
Jax
reverses, Mac reverses again trying to jockey a position for a move
from
behind. Justin Shack is slowly back up. Shack picks up the chair. He
wants his revenge on Stone! Shack swings with all his might.

*WHACK*

MR:He hit Mac D.! He hit Mac D.! Shack is stunned. Meanwhile, Stone
has
the chair, a hit to Shack who hits the opposite wall. Jax attempts to
pin
Mac D.. Ref with the count...

1.......

2.......

NO!!!

JS:Jax hops back up and goes after Shack with the bat. Shack is now
smack
dab in the middle of the room. Jax with the swing, but Shack reverses
with
a sleeper hold. You have gotta admit, whether or not you are a fan of
extreme matches, that this is one hell of a battle. All three men are
now
bloody and battered to a great extent. Shack still has Jax in the
sleeper.
As they both make their way to the floor, the ref checks on Jax, but
Jax is
not out yet. Mac D. is back up, he has the stop sign in hand. He
charges
both competitors and WHACK! He his Shack on the back of the head, but
Shack
still somehow holds onto Stone. Mac drops the stop sign, which is now
covered in blood and hooks Shack from behind. What is he gonna do
here?
Could it be?! HE JUST GERMAN SUPLEX BOTH MEN AT ONCE! THE FANS ARE
LOVING
THIS! THE COVER!

1.....

2.....

THR...NO!!!!!!!!!

JS:Both men kicked out from an excellent move by the champion. It
looks
like Mac D. is really frustrated right now, but the crowd loves it!
Mac D.
picks up Jax Stone and rolls him up.

1.....

2.....

NO!

JS:Mac D. moves on to Justin Shack and rolls him up. Ref with the
cover...

1.....

2.....

THR...NO!!

JS:These near falls are killing the fans!

AK:Mac D. scrambles to find the aluminum baseball bat and makes his way
near
the ceiling and finally retrieves it. Shack is back up and sees Mac D.
above him. He grabs the steel chair and makes his way to the ceiling.
Here
we go again. Shack with a shot, misses Mac D. Mac D attempts, gets
the
back of Shack. Mac D attempts to smack Shack against the ceiling of
this
structure once again. Shack blocks. Shack hooks Mac D.. Suplex by
Shack!
Mac D goes back first into the ceiling! Shack again! Head first into
the
ceiling. Once more! Mac D floats back to the ground.

MR:Jax Stone is awaiting Mac D on the floor. Stone has Mac. Backdrop
suplex into a pin by Stone.

1.....

2.....

THRE.....NO!!!!!!!!

MR:Who's going to win this thing??!! The fans are going nuts and no
one
seems to be able to get the upper hand. Stone is at it again. Rolling
suplexes to Mac D.. Stone is ready to end this thing! He wants that
title!
He wants to be known as the champ! Stone puts the boots to a bloody
Mac
D.. Stone picks up Mac. Stone back pedals and charges Mac and
connects
with a clothesline. Another cover. Ref with the count...

1.....

2.....

NO!

MR:Jax pins Mac again...

1.....

2.....

NO!

MR:Jax gets up and argues with the referee and shoves him against the
wall.
As the referee bounces back Jax calls Shack to come back down and
fight.
Shack accepts the challenge and starts to float back down to the
ground.
Here we go. Exchange of lefts and rights by both men. Mac D. is
slowly
getting up. Shack charges with a clothesline, Jax ducks, he hit Mac
D.! He
hit the champ! The champ goes flying. Shack can't believe and has his
back
turned. Turn around. Turn around! Jax is behind him, Shack turns
around.
Jax with a kick to Shack's midsection. Jax has him up and.....YES!
BRAINBUSTER! Shack is out cold. Jax is just lying there. Can he get
the
pin? Jax turns over and crawls to Justin Shack. Jax drapes an arm.
Could
this be it? Ref with the cover...

1.....

2.....

3!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

MR:NEW CHAMP! NEW CHAMP! NEW CHAMP! Jax Stone wins it!

JS:This is unbelievable.

Ring Announcer:The winner of this match and.....NEW IWO EXTREME
CHAMPION......JJJJJAAAAAAAAXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
SSSSSTTTTTTTTOOOOOONNNNNNNEEEEEE!

AK:What a match! These three men put it all on the line, but only one
man
could be champ and that man is Jax Stone. You should just hear the
reaction
in here folks.

MR:Oh my god! Look at Mac D.! He's going insane! He can't believe he lost! Jax Stone doesn't even see him, but he's stacking five tables in a pyramid fashion! Turn around Jax!

JS:MORE BLOOD!

AK:You sound More like JT every day.

MR:Wait! Mac D. has a barbed wire belt, and just nailed Jax Stone in the head with a huge shot! He just sent him out of the ring with his extreme title in hand!

JS:Justin Shack is getting up, but Mac D. sees him, and he just nailed Shack in the temple with a huge shot! It's chaos!

MR:Mac is picking up Shack, and is climbing up to the tope! NO! NO!!!! MAC D. JUST TOSSED SHACK THROUGH THE FIVE TABLES!!

*Boom*

AK:NO! NO!!! MAC D. HAD EXPLOSIVES! SHACK! DEAR GOD! I CAN'T EVEN SEE IT! I CAN'T SEE THROUGH THE FOG! DEAR GOD! DEAR GOD! LOOK AT SHACK! HE'S CONVULSING!!!!

(EMTS Race out, and try to assess the damage.)

MR:THE THIRD ONE TONIGHT! DEAR GOD! GIORGETTI, FLYER, AND NOW SHACK HAVE ALL FALLEN!!! OH DEAR GOD THIS NIGHT DOESN'T SEEM VERY WELL!

**Commercial Break**

Barbed Wire
Psycho Jay vs. Ken War

MR: Next, fans, is a match that everyone has been waiting for,....the
newly
returned, sadistic legend known to us all as Ken War will take on
recently
former world champ, Psycho Jay!

JS: And don't forget to tell 'em about the barbed wire for ring ropes!

MR: I wasn,....

JS: (ignoring MR) This kinda match is just what Ken War
loves,...remember
that cage match from Dia Del Nino '00 that redefined the standards for
a cage
match? Well, Ken War put on a heckuva show that night, leaving fans to
believe that he was dead and gone for many months. Well, he's back,
and in
this kinda environment, who's gonna tell him to stop?

AK: For once, you talk level-headed. Now, I'm not always one to agree
with
you, JS, 'cuz you're usually pretty bias,..

JS: (to MR) What is he talking about?

AK: ,...ed, but Ken War,...

MR: Well, you are.

AK: ,....is an awesome athlete, and unlike many others in the IWO,...

JS: What do you know, MR?

AK: ,...he is able to use extreme environments to his advantage,....

MR: A whole lot more than you, punk!

JS: Wanna bet?

AK: OKAY, GUYS! DID YOU JUST NOT LISTEN TO A WORD I SAID?!

(JS and MR look at each other,....then at the camera,....then at AK)

JS: Um,.....

MR: You know,...I always found your comments hard to follow 'cuz
you're so
much smarter than me,..

JS: Yeah, what he said,..

(As these three settle their little argument, the hauntingly familiar
tune of
the opening bass guitar of "War Machine" by KISS plays through the
Civic
Center's PA System,....the fans, some audacious enough to let out a
chorus of
boos, stand to their feet nonetheless. The fans not booing are unsure
of
what to do, remembering Dia Del Nino '00 and how sure they were that
Ken War
was gone forever.)

MR: The fans all know that music,....

JS: He truly is a War Machine,....and the damn best, at that.

AK: He's damn sick, and the damn best at that

(Ken War then appears from behind the IWO-tron, looks around at the
fans, and
walks down to ringside. One fan, a child, who says something to War,
finds
himself pulled from behind the guard railing and spit upon before
security
forces War to let go. War then gets in the ring.)

MR: WHAT IS HE DOING?

AK: HE'S CHEWING ON THE BARBED WIRE!! HIS TONGUE,....IT'S NOW COVERED
IN
BLOOD! THAT'S NO JOKE, FOLKS!

JS: YES! KEN WAR IS MUCH MORE REAL THAN THAT SIMMONS GUY HE LIKES SO
MUCH,...

(Suddenly, the wrestling fans in the Civic Centers erupt into cheers as
Psycho Jay steps out from behind the curtains. No one realizes what's
going
on,...especially War.)


JS: WHAT THE HELL?

MR: Psycho Jay has stepped out from backstage prematurely,....Ken War
is
infuriated!

AK: This is great!

("Devine" by KoRn starts to play, fans starting a chant of "HUMP HIS
HEAD!"
throughout the arena, and the former World Champ and IWO all-star
already
running down to the ring,...)

MR: Psycho Jay has not lost a bit of his standing with the fans since
Utter
Obliteration, where he lost his title to Evan Levine, the now defunct
former
World Champion,....if you missed that, be sure to buy the Ice Age 3
Video,....

JS: Or DVD,....

MR: Yes, that's right, it's one of our first DVDs from IWO Home
Video,......hits stores in about 3 weeks. Also the shortest time
between
original broadcast and video release, because you, the fans, have
demanded it!

(,...Jay slides under the ring, only to meet repeated boots to the
kidneys
from Ken War. The ref calls for the bell.)

AK: And Ken War's up to his old tricks again! Never losing an
opportunity,
even at the opponent's expense!

JS: OH, shut up, you know that Ken is,.....oh my, HE'S SWINGING JAY
INTO THE
ROPES,..Ken's coming after him to increase the impact,...

MR: Jay stops his trip,...War isn't losing momentum,...KICK TO THE
GROIN BY
PSYCHO JAY!

AK: VERTICAL SUPLEX ON TOP OF THE BARBED WIRE!

JS: WHAT A MAN! KEN WAR'S TORSO HAS NOW BEEN TORN INTO BY THOSE
BARBS,...BUT HE RETALIATES WITH LEFTS AND RIGHTS!

AK: He's now got Psycho Jay's head,...

MR: He's dragging the man by his hair,...to the corner, of
course,.....slams
his head into the ringpost! JAY'S OUT!

JS: But, why would he do that rather than use the barbed wire,...

(Ken War then takes Psycho Jay's body and places him knees-up over the
ropes,
Jay's head going through the bottom wire on the opposite side that his
legs
are draped accross)

MR: Forget the fact that we can't understand what the narrator just
said,...War has Jay in the wire,...he's out cold,....and it looks
painful!!

AK: And knowing Ken War from his past tenure here, during which he
earned
the right to be called IWO legend, he's about to,...oh dear,...he's in
the
ring,....he's sitting on the canvas,...

JS: War's an extreme genius!!

(AK and MR give JS a scolding gaze.)

JS: Um,...you know what I meant! Anyway, he's putting his feet on the
middle rope, and know he's PULLING PSYCHO JAY'S HEAD, SLITTING HIS NECK
WITH
THE WIRE!!

MR: Oh, dear,.....listen to those fans,..they're totally silent, and
Jay is
screaming,...

AK: That woke him up.

JS: Someone tell the ref to call this match,...War's got it won, and
we
don't want Jay to die (even though he's a pansy)!!

AK: This match is apparently no DQ,...

MR and JS: DUH!

AK: I was just sayin',...

MR: JAY REFUSES TO GIVE UP!!

JS: Awww, man! What's the ref doin'? He's freakin' telling Ken War
to
break the hold or he'll stop the match,......even though he has no
authority
to do so,....

MR: Right as you may be, the IWO has the health of its athle,..

JS: Don't give me that crap! What on earth do you think happened at
Dia Del
Nino, then? Huh? You know Jamie Kosoy couldn't give a rip less about
his
athletes,...

MR: Um,...

JS: Remember who gave the match back in April its stips?

(MR's face begins to turn red,..AK is looking around with a face that
says
"Was that scripted?" Ken War has taken Jay out of the ropes and then
lays
him on the ground.)

AK: Boston Crab?

MR: NO!! CATAPULT INTO THE CORNER!

JS: And Ken War is now running toward Jay, gonna knock some of those
ugly
teeth down his throat,...

(Psycho Jay, still somewhat woozy, ducks out at the last moment,
unintentionally missing Ken War's elbow,....)

MR: Psycho Jay is outta there!

AK: And WAR HAS KNOCKED HIS CHIN ON THE RING POST SO HARD THAT A
NOT-SO-SMALL PIECE OF SKIN IS MISSING!

JS: OH, THIS IS HEATIN' UP! IT'S NOT LIKE HIS BEST, BUT THIS IS WHAT
KEN
WAR IS ALL ABOUT!!

MR: What? Knocked out and on the canvas?

JS: HEY, WAR IS ON TOP OF JAY, NONETHELESS!!
1,............................................................................

..............................................................................

..............................................................................

..............................................................................

..................................................................2,..........

..............................................................................

..............................................................................

..............................................................................

..............................................................................

..............................................................................

....................WHAT THE? OH, NO!!

(Suddenly, a large, white penis,....no, not just large and
white,....immeasurably large and white,...comes out from backstage,
wearing a
Gene Simmons mask on its head.)

MR: HA HA! THAT'S VINCENT'S PENIS!!

AK: What "cock" move will we see tonight?!

JS: NONE! THAT CHEATING COCK IS JUST PUTTING JAY ON TOP OF WAR!
THEY'RE
BOTH OUT OF IT, BUT THAT DICK IS JAY'S INSURANCE POLICY!! OH, NO!
(Vincent's
penis then finds its way to JS's mouth and starts to gag him.)
ALKDHGALKDHKGHDALKGH,...

MR and AK: Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!!!

(1,...........................................................................

..............................................................................

..............................................................................

..............................................................................

.......................................................2!.....................

..............................................................................

..............................................................................

..............................................................................

..............................................................................

..............................................................................

.....................................3!!!!)

Ring Announcer (after the bell signifying the end of the match): Your
winner,.....PSYCHO JAY!!!!

(Vincent's Penis then takes up Psycho Jay's limp body and returns
backstage,
where its owner and Psycho Jay's manager, Vincent, awaits, no doubt.
Fans
are going,..um,....nuts!)

JS: Finally,....oh, gross! My breath tastes like penis!!!!

(JS gets up from the announce booth and runs off-camera)

MR and AK: Ha ha ha ha ha ha!

MR: Ken War is now being carried backstage by security,.....and will
no
doubt be stitched up in the back,...

AK: The IWO fans aren't marks,...they know when a man has given it his
all,....listen to them,...they're all clapping for the unconscious Ken
War.
At least he won't be going to the hospital, like so many other times in
his
career...

MR: At least he isn't going to the morgue, either.

(JS returns with 5 boxes of Binaca Breath Spray,...War is now backstage
being
stitched up, probably)

JS: (after spraying breath ten times) At least his mouth isn't full
of
pubic hairs!!

MR and AK: *Snickering*

JS: Heh heh,...I guess it is kinda funny,...Heh heh.

**Commercial Break**

North American Title Match
Spaz -c- vs. Marvin "Birdman" Gardens

MR: Welcome back to Meltodwn! We have the NA Title match up for you but I
have just been informed that the stipulations have been changed!

AK: To what?

MR: This is now a "Catch the Duck" match.

JS: What the hell? Catch the Duck match?

MR: Is there an echo here?

JS: Actually there is watch ... HELLO!!! (hello echo's through the arena.)

MR: Shut up. Please. Anyway, in order to win the match the competitors
must catch a duck that has been placed somewhere in the arena. Let's get it
on!

(The scene switches backstage where Spaz has a puzzled look on his face.)

Spaz: What the hell? Catch the Duck?

MR: Gardens from behind! Gardens whacks Spaz from behind! Gardens
throws
Spaz into the wall and starts punching away at him.

AK: Gardens picks Spaz up and scoops slams him on the floor. Gardens now
starts walking away.

JS: Forget trying to find that stupid duck! Just kick Spaz's ass!

MR: Spaz has gotten back up. He charges at Gardens and drop kicks him
right
in the back of the head! Spaz stomps on Gardens. Spaz now starts walking
toward the restrooms in pursuit of the duck!

JS: Gardens from behind rams Spaz into the women's restroom! Spaz flies
through the door! Gardens and Spaz are fighting in the women's bathroom!
HAHAHAHAHAH! Spaz counters a punch and rams Gardens into the tampon
dispenser! A tampon comes out hahahahahahahah! Spaz takes the tampon
and
starts smaking Gardens with it!

AK: That's just sick.

MR: Gardens now knees Spaz in the gut.

Marvin Gardens: Smack me with a tampon will ya!

MR: Gardens with a DDT on the linoleum bathroom floor! Spaz is bleeding!
What a DDT! Gardens throws Spaz out of the bathroom and they are now
fighting toward the locker rooms! The search for the duck continues!

AK: Gardens takes Spaz and throws him into the boiler room! HEY! THERE'S

THE DUCK! But awwwwwwwwwwww. The duck is on a nest! The duck has
eggs!!
Awwww! Don't hurt the duck!

JS: Gardens drops Spaz and starts running after the duck! The duck sees him

and flies straight toward him! The duck has to defend its eggs! The duck
starts clawing away at Gardens eyes!

AK: Yeah get him duck! GET THAT EVIL MAN!

MR: Spaz now sees this and starts running toward the duck. Spinning heel
kick on the duck!

AK: NO!

MR: The duck bounces on the floor and starts flying away. Spaz runs after
it but wait Gardens is taking one of the eggs from the nest. He chucks it at
Spaz and it hits him straight in the head! Spaz is down! Spaz is down!
Spaz is down! Spaz is down! Argh, damn echo!

JS: Spaz gets back up ... he doesn't look too pleased. He charges at
Gardens ... SPEAR! Spaz starts punching away at Gardens. Spaz picks
Gardens
up, belly to belly suplex! Spaz finds a steel chair ... he starts nailing
Marvin with the chair!

AK: Where did that duck go?

MR: Spaz picks Marvin up, piledriver on the chair! Marvin Gardens is laid
out! Spaz now gets out of the boiler room for the search of the duck! The
duck is somewhere in this arena but where? It flew away!

JS: Wait a second ... the duck is coming out of nowhere! It is clawing away
at Spaz now! It is clinging onto Spaz's neck! What the hell is this? Spaz
reaches and grabs the duck .... he throws it straight to the wall!

AK: NOO!!!! He's gonna kill that poor duck! The duck is quivering on the
floor! It's almost dead!

JS: Hmmm the animal rights activists are gonna have our heads.

MR: Spaz now grabs the duck! He wins the match! Spaz wins the match!
Here
comes Marvin Garden he starts pounding on Spaz! Folks we have to take a
commercial break!

**Commercial Break**

Main Event
World Title Dumpster Match
Live from Donnie Daze's Front Yard!
Phelen Kell -c- vs. Syphon Fission vs. Donnie Daze

MR : Next up is our big main event! Donnie Daze, Phelen Kell, and Syphon Fission will be having a war in Dazeís backyard, in a dumpster match!

JS : What are you talking about? This match will suck!

AK : How so?

JS : 1) There are no hot valets. 2) I doubt there will be any blood. 3) Theyíre all faces!

AK : Well, I think youíre an idiot.

JS : Well, of course you want to have sex with me, but-

SMACK!

JS : Every time I feel the soft caress of your hand, itís like angelís breath on-

SMACK!

JS : Okay, that one hurt.

MR : I think that any one of these men has a good chance of walking out of here with that World title.

AK : Ugh, not Daze. Nikki dated him once, and he didnít seem like a good date at ALL.

MR : Iím going to have to go with Fission for this one, because he seems to want this match more than anyone else. Also, Daze and Phelen both have serious injuries.

AK : Daze has a stubbed toe! Itís not a serious injury.

MR : Maybe not to you, but the toe looked really hurt.

AK : Whatever, letís just get to the match.

(The big screen switches to Donnie Dazeís yard. Meygon is in the ring, making announcements.)

Meygon : Hailing first, from some place I donít know because I canít get to the IWO web site Ö the Innovator of Marco Polo Ö DonnnnniiiiiiiieeeeeeDaaaaaaazzzzzzzzzzzeeeeeeeee!

(Something by Slayer plays as Daze walks out of his house and into his yard. Heís finishing off a Triple Crunch Zinger from KFC. He waves to the camera.)

Meygon : Next, from another place I donít know, for the aforementioned reason Ö the winner of the major push tournament, and considered by many to be the best pure wrestler in the IWO Ö SyphonnnnnnnFisssssssssssiooooooooooonnnnnnnn!

(Syphonís music plays as he walks out. The MAN-O-WAR looks intently at the camera and jumps around, looking pumped for the match.)

Meygon : Last, the current IWO World champion Ö the only five time IWO World champion ever Ö ďthe Legend,Ē Pheeeeelllllllennnnnnnnn Kelllllllllllll!

(Kell walks out as his music plays, which I really should know by now, but donít. Possibly ĎBloodlineí by Slayer Ö or maybe thatís Dazeís music. Or maybe thatís ĎYour Diseaseí by Salive. Sorry, Iím ignorant! I remembered theTriple Crunch Zinger and the nicknames, didnít I?! DIDNíT I?!!!)

MR : All three men circling now. Remember, the purpose for this match is to put one of your opponents in that there dumpster, and close the lid.

JS : That there dumpster? Since when are you a redneck? Youíre starting to sound like JR.

MR : (Sigh) A man can only dreamÖ

JS : Uh Ö yeah. Anyway, Daze made the first move by attacking Fission from behind, as Fission was looking at Kell. Now both Kell and Daze are working over Fission with punches, which is a pretty smart move, I guess, since Fissionís the only un-injured man in this match.

AK : Daze isnít injured! He has a stubbed toe!

MR : Ashley, donít be so insensitive. The man was in severe pain.

AK : Arrrgh, whatever. Daze whips Syphon into a short arm clothesline from Kell. Now Kell picks up Syphon and delivers a powerbomb. Iím not so sure that was a smart move, with his injured back.

MR : It looks like you may have been right there, Ashley, as Kell is
now
clutching his back in apparent pain.

JS : And Daze is capitalizing on that, by delivering a double ax-handle
to
Kellís back. Now heís stomping on Kellís injured back.

AK : But Syphon sneaks up behind Daze and delivers a low blow! Now as
Daze
staggers, Syphon pulls him up into a neckbreaker!

MR : Phelen is getting to his feet slowly, and Syphon boots him in the
gut.
Heís going for the Death Plunge already!

AK : Phelen pulls his arms down, though, and trips Syphon up! Now he
slingshots him into the side of the dumpster. And Syphon is slamming
Kellís
head into the dumpster over and over.

JS : That brings new meaning to the term ďtaking out the trash.Ē (Corny
laughter)

AK : ÖYouíre a moron.

JS : (Sticks tongue out)

AK : And immature, too.

JS : I know you are, but what am I?

AK : Immature.

JS : I know you are, but what am I?

AK : Immature.

JS : I know you are, but-

MR : Shut up!

AK and JS : Sorry, Max.

MR : I wish I could believe that this time. Anyway, Donnie has gotten
back
up, and he and Syphon are now taking turns beating on Kellís back.

AK : Syphon just stomped on Donnieís toe! Heís staggering around
holding it.
What a wuss!

JS : Now Syphon clotheslines Daze, nearly knocking him out of his
boots.

MR : Syphon makes his way over to Kell, but Phelen springs up and
plants him
with a DDT. Wow, this match is really taking a lot out of the Legend.
His
face is covered in sweat, and heís breathing heavily. I donít think he
should have tried to wrestle here tonight.

JS : He was cleared to wrestle, wasnít he?

MR : Yeah, but-

JS : End of discussion. Phelen should be in there just as much as
either of
the other two.

MR : Youíre an asshole, you know that?

JS : Thanks.

AK : Phelen repeatedly elbow drops Fission. Thatís twice Ö thrice Ö
four
times Ö Phelen goes for a fifth, but Fission trips him up. Fission now
pulls
up Phelen and is choking him against the side of the dumpster!

MR : Oh, look out! Daze just ran up and dropkicked Fission, which
pushed
Fission into Kell, but thereís nowhere to go since heís right up
against the
dumpster. Daze just basically sandwiched Fission and Kell between his
feet
and the dumpster.

JS : Even though Fission took the dropkick, it looks like Kell took the
worst of that. Heís slumped over on the ground now coughing.

MR : Donnie picks up Fission and is just going balistic on him. Left,
right,
left, right Ö he backs up and measures Syphon Ö ooh, low kick!

JS : Daze apparently doesnít care too much for wrestling cleanly. I
like
that.

AK : I still say heís a horrible date.

JS : Oh please, you werenít even the one going out with him.

AK : Yeah, but Nikki said he was horrible in bed.

JS : They didnít get to bed! The date ended in the restaurant!

AK : ÖStill.

MR : Donnie is now taking this opportunity to taunt. Iím not sure
thatís
such a good idea Ö and it looks like it wasnít, because as he turned
around
Kell just about took his head off with a clothesline!

JS : That looked like it hurt.

AK : Ya think?

JS : Not really, just making conversation.

AK : Syphon now comes up from behind Kell and is again pounding on that
injured back. He wasnít lying when he said he wrestles smart. Now he
grabs
both Phelen and Dazeís heads and rams them together. The old noggin
knocker!

JS : Heís not Hulk Hogan!

MR : Well, nonetheless, Fission is kicking ass right now. He picks up
Daze,
who looks pretty woozy. Whatís he gonna do now?

AK : Oh wait, heís looking towards the house. Donít tell me heís gonna
do
what I think heís gonna do. And he is! Fission runs and throws Daze
threw
his own window! My God, my God! Daze is broken into a million pieces!

MR : Ahem, I believe thatís my line.

AK : Oh, sorry. Go right ahead.

MR : MY GOD, MY GOD! DAZE IS BROKEN INTO A MILLION PIECES! HELLFIRE AND
BRIMSTONE!

AK : Nice touch.

MR : Thanks.

JS : Now Syphon is going threw Dazeís back door. It looks like he threw
Daze
into the kitchen area. Donnieís just lying there on the tile floor.

AK : Syphon picks up Donnie and drags him over to the fridge. He opens
the
door, places Donnieís head in the opening, and starts slamming the
door!
Fission is just relentless!

MR : Donít speak too soon, because Donnie just mule kicked Syphon! And
now
heís turned the tables by slamming the door on Syphonís head!

JS : You know, Daze has the advantage in this match. He knows where
everything is in his house.

MR : You actually have a point there, Jason. Now Daze seems to be
taking
advantage of that, as he opens a cabinet and pulls out Ö hot sauce?

AK : Ack, heís pouring it in Syphonís eyes! You KNOW that has to sting!

JS : Where the hell is that slacker Kell?

AK : Presumably resting. Wait, there he is. He just snuck in the back
door Ö
literally.

JS : Why is it that whenever we mention something, like where Kell is
or how
Daze knows where everything is in his house, then something happens
that has
to do with it?

MR : What do you mean?

JS : Look at this : Kell seems to be holding back, maybe waiting for
Daze to
notice him before getting involves.

(As he says this, Daze turns towards Kell, who nails him with a frying
pan.)

JS : See?

MR : Thatís just a coincidence.

JS : Is it? Is it really?

AK : Yes, you tard.

JS : :(

MR : Kell is now slamming Dazeís head into the kitchen counter. Oooh, I
think that just busted Dazeís nose open. I mean, MY GOD! DAZE IS BUSTED
WIDE
OPEN! THE KITCHEN LOOKS LIKE A TRAIN WRECK!

JS : Damn, even I donít get that excited over blood. You know, you
donít
have to be EXACTLY like JR.

MR : But it makes me feel special.

JS : Iím sure it does.

AK : Kell is now dragging Daze into the living room area. Is that
Dazeís
manager watching TV on the couch?

MR : Yes, Joey Legion is watching TV. And eating from a bowl of
popcorn, I
might add.

JS : Hey, Kell just took his bowl of popcorn!

(In the living room)

Joey : Hey, thatís my bowl of popcorn. Get your own!

Kell : Bite me!

(At announcing table)

MR : Kell dumps out the popcorn and cracks the bowl over Dazeís head.
Joeyís
still protesting, so he cracks the bowl over Joeyís head too.

AK : And here comes Syphon. Oh my God, he has a butcher knife!

MR : Whuh-oh, he looks pissed.

AK : Syphon lunges for Kell, but Kell dodges and grabs his arm. Theyíre
struggling over that knife!

JS : Hey, this has definite potential for blood Ö and lots of it!

MR : Boy howdy!

JS : ÖNo more of that.

AK : Iíd have to agree with Jason there.

MR : :(

AK : Syphon pokes Kell in the eyes! Kell releases the kinfe, and Syphon
rears back. Heís gonna stab Phelen!

MR : But Daze smacks the knife out of Phelenís hand!

(In living room)

Daze : There will be no stabbing in this house! Do you know how much of
a
pain blood stains are to get up?

Fission : Shut up!

(Announce table)

MR : That couldíve gotten messy. Syphon now starts brawling with Daze,
and
the two are battling back through the hallway! Theyíre heading out the
back
door and into the yard, with Kell in hot pursuit.

JS:Syphon slams Daze down into the yard, as we can see the look of pain in Daze's face. He must have landed on something rigged.

AK:Kell comes out of nowhere and catches Syphon with a huge clothesline! Daze! He kicks Phelen Kell in the gut! DAZED AND CONFUSED! DAZED AND CONFUSED! DEAR GOD! DAZE JUST ROCKED KELL! NO! DEAR GOD!

MR:DAZE GRABS KELL! AND HE TOSSES HIM INTO THE DUMPSTER! HE SLAMS THE LID SHUT! NEW WORLD CHAMPION!?!?

(We see the referee waving it off.)

JS:SUCKS TO BE DAZE!

MR:Both people have to be in the dumpster!?! That's a rather tough job! Daze goes over to Fission, as Daze just have to throw Fission into the dumpster.

AK:Kell is regaining his balance, as he's climbing out of that dumpster. He's definitly been affected by this match, and even the wounds from Ice Age still.

JS:Fission just caught Daze with one HELL of a low blow! And now Fission grabs a trash can lid and smacks Daze upside the head!

MR:Kell comes over, and hits the STEEL RAIN ON FISSION! DEAR GOD! ON THAT TRASH CAN!

JS:And Kell looks over to the fallen Daze, and locks on Malicious Intent!!! Dear god! Daze is screaming! He's screaming for his life!

MR:Daze is fallen, and Daze is failing. Kell releases the hold, and grabs the down Fission. Kell picks him onto his shoulder, and tosses him into the trash can! Dear god! Can Kell retain the title?!?

JS:Kell walks back over to Daze, and picks him up. Daze though! He's hammering at the back of Phelen Kell! Dear god! Look at that puss on his back! Kell is in pain, and DAZE CLOTHESLINES KELL INTO THE GARBAGE CAN! DEAR GOD! DAZE! DAZE GRABS THE TOP OF THE TRASH CAN, AND HE JUST CLOSED IT! DEAR GOD! DEAR GOD! WE HAVE A NEW IWO WORLD CHAMPION IN DONNIE FUCKIN DAZE!!!

MR:NO! NO! KELL'S FOOT IS STICKING OUT OF THE DUMPSTER! HE PUSHES IT UP, AND GRABS DAZE INTO THE DUMPSTER!!!! DEAR GOD! AND THAT LID FALLS BACK! ALL THREE MEN ARE INSIDE THAT DUMPSTER! THEY ARE FIGHTING IT OUT, WINNER GETS THE IWO WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP!!!

(The three announcers just wait, and wait as there is huge scuffling inside. All of a sudden, we see the lid pop open, as Phelen Kell emerges. Kell jumps out of the dumpster, and slams the lid down onto Daze, who was trying to exit...)

*Ding, ding, ding*

MR:DEAR GOD WHAT A SHOW!!!!

(Fade Out)